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A rock fan. A thinker. A psychic empath and a channel, a Tarot reader. A polyandrist; The lover of men, kings, and gods. An eternal romance analyzer.  A romantic pervert. Generation X Rebel. A psycho-spiritual life coach.

About Me and The Party

What am I talking about here?

I often make a reference to “my voices”, “hearing voices”, or “having conversations in spirit” with people’s soul-level consciousness. I refer to my favorite spirit companions as “the party that I wouldn’t end for anything”, or even “my imaginary boyfriends/friends”. As it is a bit of an awkward thing to explain, I use humoristic expressions to cut corners while writing. Let me try and explain this in a more serious tone.

Opening up my psychic abilities in 2012

This started in 2012 when I got curious about people who said they consciously learned to communicate with the spirit world. I wanted to learn how to do that. After several failed attempts with automatic writing, “just hearing with one’s heart”, even Tarot cards failing to work, I bought a pendulum.

What is a pendulum?

A pendulum is a pointy rock dangling on a string, and, as far as I’m concerned, the most impressive of all spiritual tools. The principle is similar to an Ouija board. The difference is that you control it yourself. You cannot explain it away by telling yourself someone screwing with you. It would be easy to explain the voices away as imagination if you weren’t simultaneously looking at a rock that moves when it really should not.

In basic use, the pendulum gives you simple ‘yes’, ‘no’, and ‘maybe’ answers. In addition, it can be used together with an alphabetic chart to spell out messages just like an Ouija board. Rather than sliding on a surface, however, it dangles in the air, drawing a circle around the letter that it needs. Creepy as, but so cool!

Some people explain hearing voices as “going crazy through playing with a pendulum”, but if you think a rock dangling on a string can break your mind, you MUST be crazier than I am.

Moving onto automatic writing

I became crazy good at using the pendulum, but at the same time, I felt it was TOO SLOW to tolerate. It moved at speeds an outsider couldn’t keep up with, but it was still too slow. I decided to try automatic writing again. I could already hear the spirits in my head while the pendulum was moving, but once I put the pendulum away, I couldn’t either hear anything or I wasn’t sure what was being said. The pendulum strengthened the message, but it was slow.

I then attempted automatic writing and it worked! The texts don’t make much sense when read back, as it is mainly the spirits commenting on my thoughts, rather than them saying anything profound. I found I have a psychological block in place, which pretty much blocks them from saying anything much. They talk, but it’s mainly me talking and them commenting.

After automatic writing, I started simply tapping my fingers against my thigh to simulate the writing to strengthen the message, and after that, I was able to simply hear the spirits without help.

What’s the point of hearing them if they can’t say anything (much)?

Our roles are reversed. They ask the questions and I answer. This was because my lot in life was to become a teacher. The best way to learn is to teach. Initially, I connected with a very loving soul I named Anton. He was for a few months the only companion I cared about, although not the only one present. I still don’t know who he actually is. (There was also about two weeks alone with a man who I thought was my Twin Flame, but things are a bit more complicated than that. He vanished due to an incident and Anton took his place. I won’t go into the details here even though this is too important not to mention.)

Anton and I started a website called which STILL gives me a high just typing that address. It was such a loving and understanding Twin Soul website. It got sadly derailed by a bunch of uninvited guests that appeared in the spirit form nearing the end of 2012. I haven’t done anything but arguing with these spirits since November 2012. The arguing, however, has taught me an INCREDIBLE amount of things about people that I wouldn’t have otherwise learned.

Who, or what, are the voices?

Initially, when I started this, I was under the impression that “the spirit guides” were non-embodied entities, who had nothing else to do in life but to guide humans. (Very self-congratulating of us. We‘re not that important!) What they actually are, like many psychics know, your friends, family, other people who love you more than anything – and if you’re like me, a bunch of people who wish you’d love them back even though you blatantly reject them. (They hear it, they just don’t understand why they are not good enough.)

The brain is a receiver/transmitter of the spirit, aka, the thought

It doesn’t matter whether the spirits have a body or not. There is no difference talking to an ancient person from antique Greece to talking to your next-door neighbor currently doing your head in by singing off tune. The living people cannot hear these conversations NECESSARILY on their body-level. They may, and I know some of it seeps through, but I couldn’t say how much. All I know is that I can have a full conversation with someone while watching them have a live show over the Internet… They have no idea.


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