What is the line between narcissism and high self-esteem?

People often confuse being self-satisfied with being narcissistic. This is not truly a good measure to say whether someone is narcissistic or not. However, there is a link between the two: a narcissistic person has an unrealistically positive self-image, and they believe, unrealistically, that others admire them over something that the others might never feel is admirable in the first place, such as their ability to manipulate and control others. Therefore, regarding self-confidence, the line to draw is REALITY. Is their self-satisfaction based on reality or fantasy? Is yours? Narcissists** live in a partly imaginary world where other people function in similarly imaginary roles; if you’d ask a narcissist what you’re like as a person, likely, you wouldn’t even recognize yourself from the description. If you ask what they are like, their answer could be ANYTHING.

I often say the goal is to be as close to being a narcissist as you can without being it. The fine line is to NOT lose grip with reality. To keep your feet on the ground as you self-assess brutally, and try not to get people’s flattery get into your head. Then, the other balance; you should be AFFECTED by other people, which can put your heart into a bit of a whirl mill, and often people who fear becoming narcissistic tend to try TOO HARD not to let admiration and compliments get to them, so the self-satisfaction would stay at bay. However, it is important to let yourself feel good about your achievements, too, to revel in your own success, and still keep your sanity by picking whose opinion you take for constructive criticism or fair evaluation and whose opinion is nothing but ass-kissing and empty flattery.

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