You have to say NO to stuff that makes you unhappy.

When you’re a grown-up, you have to become your own parent. You have to know to say no to stuff that’s bad for you, even though you’re legally old enough to take part in it. It’s YOUR responsibility now, and you can also say yes to things that make you happy: things that are good for you. If it makes you happy – good; if it makes you unhappy – bad.

What makes you happy or miserable is individual. If you cannot approach it with an open, joyful, guilt-free heart, it’s not for you. One of those things you’ll be technically old enough to take part in is sex. To some people, sex is the most happy and joyful thing in the world, even if it’s non-commital, but to others, it’s a source of depression and anxiety. You shouldn’t copy what your friends are doing; no matter what they say about it if you don’t feel happy about it. For instance, if you cannot have sex with strangers without feeling horrible afterward, it’s not for you. To many many people, drugs and alcohol work for a while and then start to eat you up inside. Over-indulgence rarely works, but then there are people who can over-indulge, and their only misery is the fact others can’t, and their friends drop out before the party is over. (Just keep drinking with the poor buddy, but swap the champagne for Coke Zero, hey?)

In contrast, there are people who swear by motherhood and family. To some people, they are a source of anxiety and separation from what they love; sex, usually. If you have to choose between awesome sex and kids, sex may well win for some people, but some know from a young age that family is all they want. Having children is the kind of decision you can never take back, and I personally say that although you may regret not having had kids, it is better to regret not having had them than it is to regret having had them.

Being a grown-up means you have to take responsibility for your own choices. Being an old soul means you’ve learned to do just that very well. Sometimes, you have to say no to stuff you are legally allowed to partake in, and sometimes, you have to say yes to stuff that would make most people miserable and anxious. That’s what being an adult means. Choices. Available choices are yours to make. By 18, you’re supposed to know yourself well enough to stay away from things that will not be in your best interest, even under peer pressure to do the opposite.

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