Feeling the True Emotion Mirror possessiveness. “They’re mine, no matter what,” and how does this feeling deceive you.

There’s a nuance of a difference in True Emotion Mirror possessiveness and regular-ass abusive possessive feeling. IF you feel a possessive feeling about a supposed True Emotion Mirror, this describes the differences:

True Emotion Mirror: “I don’t have to do anything, I don’t have to hold onto them, they’re mine. I can feel how they feel about me and they are mine.”

Abusive: “I have every right to stop them from leaving me; they’re mine. I know how I feel about them, I’ll never agree to let them go, they’re mine.”

Abusive possessiveness is TERRIFIED someone is going to steal “your” man or woman from you, or that they’re going to leave you voluntarily if you don’t watch them constantly. A True Emotion Mirror connection is different in that you can let them go, you can let them marry someone else, you can let them have 12 kids with someone else, and you STILL KNOW deep down they’re yours, they love you, and they’ll be back. (Of course, it will hurt, kinda, to let them go; it may even make you angry, but you know they’ll be back. It’s a kind of feeling that says, “They won’t be happy there; they’ll come back because nobody can live like that for the rest of their lives; they’ll need me for their sanity and to feel properly loved and alive.” You know they are yours because they love you, want you, and need you just to be happy and alive.)

Abusive possessiveness fears the loss of control over that person. Abusive people need tools to control their “possession.” They need to use other people, lies, manipulation, and threats to play the victim, use a baby trap even to keep their “possession” at heel. They need marriage licenses, guilt trips, threats, lowering their expectations about what relationships would be with someone else, all kinds of bullshit to keep their man or woman from leaving. That’s the big difference. An abusive possessiveness is the sensation of entitlement or “a right” to a person, a True Emotion Mirror feels “Well, it is what it is. We’re together because we both want to be together, even if we’re together in spirit or at heart only.”

“The same thing makes us feel alive.”

A True Emotion Mirror feels that they’re “made for or from the same stuff.” The others cannot give their counterpart what they can give. They cannot make him or her happy. A True Emotion Mirror knows what others can give you is unsustainable: They are unhappy where their True Emotion Mirror happy, and their TrEmoR is unhappy where the competitor is happy. Only TrEmoRs can be blissfully happy in the same place, at the same time, in same way, and over the same things…

Trail Companions* cannot EVER fix that problem from their relationship: they are never completely happy at the same time about the same things. That will ALWAYS get in the way, and relationship-aware True Emotion Mirrors know that, and that gives them the confidence not to fret when their True Emotion Mirror tries out other relationships and ways to live.

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