You don’t know who you are until you know what group of people you want to make happy.

Heterosexuals should feel the need to make the opposite gender happy. Homosexuals wish to make the same gendered people and the gay section of those people happy. You may want to make children happy, animals, you name it, but to know who you wish to serve is to know who you are. When the service you provide doesn’t feel like “you have to,” it is the source of your own happiness to see those people happy in the way that you want to make them happy.

Some people serve by taking care of other people’s physical needs, while others focus on their emotional needs. Further, there are sexual needs to be met and served. Some of us want to do all of that, some of us want to do some of that, and some have further needs to serve through: to make others laugh, to entertain—help them fight boredom—keep them safe, educate, and keep bringing them luxuries. There are so many ways to serve.

If you are completely focused on other people who are not making you happy, thinking they damned well should, you’ll feel adrift. You cannot find true happiness without giving happiness to others. It has to be a two-way street. Nobody has ever been made happy by being only the object of service. NOBODY has ever been happy by being the object of service. Happiness always comes from that two-way street. I make you happy, and you make me happy by being happy or by doing something else to make me happy that then makes you happy because I’m happy.

If your primary focus is not in making people feel joy, you don’t even know why you exist. It’s a source of a lot of pain.

Luckily, it’s really easy to sift focus because you only need to think about people who you love without effort. You just have to start thinking, “Who has the capacity to make me happy if I make them happy?” and you’re already far along toward your own joy. Then, start a freaking YouTube channel. Joy!

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