Flirtation in the Normal Person* and the Savants* way can throw a lot of True Emotion Mirrors into a twist that is not easy to unravel. Let me describe some flirtation techniques that often get lost by a different type of a thinker – and how they often relate to also our natural bend towards polyrelationships. Although some of these bonding methods clearly are stemming from one or the other way of thinking, this is the only time when they break the mold of the Savants*/the Normal Person* thinking simply out of being learned through reincarnation to be the method the opposite gender prefers as a mode of bonding. “That is how men/women are”.

the Savants* -bonding methods

Both bonding methods, obviously, are attempts to be let into a secret part of the other person’s soul. The Savants* have great respect for the inner core of their lover and take their time approaching, while the Normal Person* want it opened to them, pronto. The Savants* will patiently wait for an admission to the “secret garden” of their lover’s or friend’s heart, but the Normal Person* will (attempt to) break through the walls, piss on the flower beds, tear down the flower pots, and declare the place their possession. For a fellow the Normal Person*, that is amusing and exciting, and they will join the destruction of their own garden because none of it really mattered in the first place (I wonder what we will plant together once we’re done!), but to a Savants*, this is an absolute violation of everything they hold dear, and the Normal Person* that has been admitted in and then done this is lower of the lowest of life forms to them from there on in. Even if the Savants* would see the benefit of having their garden destroyed and their plants pulled out by the root, they will not allow the Normal Person* in for the re-establishing of that garden but they will simply restrengthen their barriers and walls, and are even less interested in further contact with other people.

Love at first sight

The Savants* Mature State True Emotion Mirror bonding, with no distractions, should lead to an immediate, lifelong bonding of souls who have known each other for eons. This begins with an eye-contact,  subconscious recognition of the long lost lover, often unspoken reunion that should need no words to be made clear what this meeting means; instant telepathic connection or heart-bond. Without a word, these two should be able to agree on the basics… Such as: “You go home, end your relationship, and we pick up where we left off today.” Basics, yes. These two can safely move in together straight away, provided they will remain secure in the knowledge that this is true love, and not doubt their instincts and feelings, that are, unfortunately, entirely too easily shaken by modern cynicism and cookie-cutter relationship and dating -rules.

How to mess it up

Start calculating or “playing your cards” with them. If you don’t trust your instincts, and their love for you, if you start mincing your words or be “sensible” or in any way guarded around them, you’ll violate the trust that was between you from the start. (Usually happens within hours from meeting.)

Refusing sex at this stage will count as calculating and not trusting them. Obviously, if you don’t trust someone, you absolutely shouldn’t have sex with them, even if they were a True Emotion Mirror, but DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, decide to play the good girl -card solely in order to not appear too easy for him, because that will translate to nothing but mistrust or treating this relationship “like just another, ordinary relationship” noting to the guy (usually) that you don’t feel the same undeniable love as they feel for you and make them feel stupid for thinking such romance would be able to exist as a result!! (This is not about ego, this is the opposite of ego, keeping up appearances. Your refusal, if you know different in your heart is about ego; “appearances”, and since you take on an inauthentic approach, you will break what was authentic to begin with and wind up ruining it.)

Heart-to-heart

the Savants* True Emotion Mirrors who meet at the Interrupted, Undecided, or Uncharted state should deepen the bond instantly with a good heart-to-heart. They need to have a conversation to reach each other’s core, and to quickly do away with the distance by trusting each other into each other’s hearts.

This also creates a bond between Trail Companions* who are both the Savants*, as long as neither one truly expects a full bonding with someone else (anymore).

How to spoil it

Use something that you’ve learned and make a thoughtless joke about it, and fail to appreciate the privilege it was to be allowed in in the first place. (Note that just because the Savants* trust you with a lot of personal stuff straight away, it is not intended for you to treat it with disrespect. This is YOUR test: Can you be trusted with such information. Although this stuff is not a secret, nor will disrespecting it ruin the Savants*, the way you treat it will speak volumes of what kind of a person you are, and if you fail the test, you will be cast aside for as long as you fail to realize what it was that you did wrong – and even then it may be that you failed the test SO BAD that there is nothing you can do to regain the respect you lost. Note that you are being tested for being respectable rather than whether or not you can be trusted because the Savants* don’t really have secrets, but how you treat the knowledge that you have of them will reveal whether or not you can be respected.)

Sexual bonding

Some True Emotion Mirrors bond sexually, this is the more cautious approach to the Heart-to-Heart, the core is potentially out of the game but the sexual bond keeps them coming together over and over. What started out as a one-night-stand can be, when approached gently in the Savants* thinking way, grown into a fully matured True Emotion Mirror relationship. (TMS’s in this situation should keep to themselves a lot and potentially never mention the relationship to anyone.)

How to muck up your chances

Never attempt to take things deeper. If you never open up a conversation, the relationship will never deepen. The other bad option is to DEMAND a deeper relationship like you had an entitlement to it, will set a Savants* on a run in an instant. Between the Savants* thinking True Emotion Mirrors ; whispering “I love you” during sex is usually completely acceptable when a guy says it, but a Savants* thinking male might have trouble trusting a girl on that. Here’s why (Read the part about the Savants* male and female trust issues. Girls usually know by instinct not to go there, because the runners are not far, here, either. Men fear girls want money, gifts, house, family yada yada out of them, and some the Savants* thinking girls fear all men want is to put a ring on their finger in order to force them into a traditional wifey role, to quit their job, start pushing out babies and become their trophy housewife… So know what it is that they’re afraid of and see if you can dispell the fears first.)

the Normal Person* bonding

the Normal Person* like to bond by testing each other. They like to poke and prod to see what the other one is made out of. “How tough are you”. They lose their respect for the Savants* easily (especially the Normal Person* women for the Savants* thinking males), because the Savants* tend to back off from a conflict too easily, making the Normal Person* judge them for “lacking balls”. The true reason why the Savants* backs off is because they still have a level of respect for the Normal Person*, and, also, they feel like they could easily tear the Normal Person* apart should they engage them in a fight.

Irritating the other

There is a couple of variations of this. “I’ll show you my most irritating and disgusting of habits and see if you will still think you could deal with me” and “I will challenge you to a fight and see how dedicated you are to our relationship”. The idea is to test each other’s boundaries and dedication, and to get to know each other on an intimate level. This is poking the other for attention, “make a notice of me, I am not like the others, I am here”.

the Normal Person* / the Savants* Mismatch

The Normal Person* thinks these games are nicely irritating, they LOVE getting irritated by others and be irritating to them because they know why it happens, but the Normal Person* is easily turned off by them; they are simply irritated, they don’t find any of it to be amusing or arousing, they simply lose interest (until they are ready to call it quits with you entirely, even as someone they’d say hi on a street).

Lesson for the Normal Person*:

If you get a bad reaction from someone, try putting on a playful face. The Savants* often need you to use your tone of voice or facial expressions much stronger than you’d do with the Normal Person*, because the Savants* judge others all the time, so they need to know you don’t mean it seriously, or that your “judgement” is really a compliment.

Lesson for the Savants*:

Take it as a game; play. Don’t take any of it seriously, as in, consider all words to mean the opposite of what they are saying, even when said with a dead-pan face.

Jealousy games

This has more to do with polygynous and polyandrous tendencies than the Normal Person* and the Savants* thinking, even if they do often go hand-in-hand. OK, this will get complicated real quick so do feel OK about reading this a few times over because most likely this makes no sense at first reading: First: polyandrous women and polygynous men do not react to jealousy games AT ALL. They see no sense in them, they simply go: “OK, you’re spoken for, moving on.” or, in the best case scenario: “OK, you’re in a relationship right now, I’ll just wait until you snap to (your f*kn) senses and we’ll give this another go!” Now, if you are a polyandrous man and you try to use this on your ideal partner which would be a polyandrous woman, you will totally shoot yourself in the leg (and the same goes for polygynous woman trying this on a polygynous man), because this tactic is designed for completely different types of people than you are. You’re wooing the wrong crowd, and the only type of a person you’re going to attract, if you’re successful, is the WRONG kind of a person! This post explains this in more detail, but to summarize; polygynous women get turned on by the idea of having to CONTINUALLY compete over the attention of one guy even in a permanent relationship, whether this is conscious or subconscious is another thing entirely. That is why jealousy games work on many women. Now, Polyandrous women get turned on by the idea of COMPLETELY commanding their guy’s attention and DOMINATING other women by having his full attention because SHE DESERVES it, not because she demands it, or puts a lot of guilt trips on him, so if she has lost you before she’s even begun to woo your interest, she’s not going to waste time trying – the polygynous woman will. The polyandrous woman wants to WIN by a landslide, and even if she knows you’re hers, she’ll wait for a better opportunity to win your affections than trying to compete with another woman, whose mere existence is a turn off for her. (She, as a likely the Savants*, will also respect genuine relationships rather than try to break them for the sake of her own ego like the Normal Person* like to do, because they think it’s funny.)

the Savants* will never want to own anyone, either. Jealousy games, therefore don’t work for the Savants* from the point of view that they will never try and chase anyone who, to them, seems disinterested, and particularly, if that person seems interested in someone else entirely. Their love for their True Emotion Mirror is stronger than their need to own them or have them for themselves; they will love their happiness more than what they’ll have a need to own them. A note to the Savants* thinking True Emotion Mirrors , however; sometimes your respect for their free choice may actually work against their happiness; if it is you that they truly want you do not want to be “noble” about it and deny them the opportunity to live happily ever after with you, now do you?

Negotiations

The authentically the Normal Person* way of thinking relationships as types of business partnerships or transactions takes a flirtatious tone when used as a little bit of a dig: “So what are you willing to do for me, should you have me?” This way of flirting will work for the Savants*, too, if they do not take this seriously at all, and what the bartering is focussed on is mainly hugs, kisses, wild sexual favors and the like, rather than jokes about cars, jewellery, gifts, and the like, unless aimed as a joke towards people who think this way. It is a good subtle way to figure out which thinking type you are flirting with, to start a conversation on the basis of “Ok, here’s what I have to offer, I have hugs, kisses, a massive cock… or I have endless patience for doing laundry, picking up the kids, and making sure your drains don’t leak – which will you choose..?” The girls who choose the hugs, kisses and a massive cock are good, hard the Savants*, and the ones thinking uuuuh, a man who does housework are soft in the hea… no, I mean, the Normal Person*.

Negotiations work well also,  because men are used to (from previous incarnations) bartering for their girl’s hand and to think that they have to buy their affections, with their father or the girl herself, but they have been trained to think that love is a form of a negotiation or a deal to be made. This is not the way the Savants* want it, but they have accepted it to be the way that it is. To put their minds at ease, the girl can start the bartering, too, along the lines of… “OK, what would you buy my love with, gold and silver, your endless work hours, or would you drown me in hugs and kisses and words of love instead?” Remember: “Oh don’t lie” at the wrong answer, and tell them, proudly, should they foolishly choose that option, if you are the Savants*, that you cannot be bought by gold and silver, and the richest of men will not take your hand if their heart is as cold as yours!

How to muck this up

Ignore the signs of a different type of a thinker and trust you can change him or her later.

Arguing

the Savants* do not needlessly argue with people who they love, if and when they argue, it is important. They talk (or joke) things through. Again, the Normal Person* behave the complete opposite way. The Savants*’s breakup routine (with someone they are completely fed up with) is the same as the Normal Person*’s bonding session. This means that once the Savants* is ready for a good fight, they’ve already made the decision that this relationship MEANS NOTHING to them, but the Normal Person* looks at them pleased with themselves: “They are finally warming up to me!”

Further trouble arises, because the Savants* may get completely addicted to the fight, with no intention of making the relationship complete again, quite the opposite. They are only looking to find out how for how long the Normal Person* is willing to bang their head against the wall and humiliate themselves before they understand this relationship is never going to happen. This can be incredibly satisfying for a Savants*. Once they lose the last of their patience, the Savants* fall in love with the idea of emotionally hurting this person so bad that they are scarred for life for it. They want to leave an argument as an absolute winner and leave nothing out of their opponent but a wet, bloody pulp recognizable as a human being by DNA testing only. 😀 They will look for the sore spot endlessly so that they can shoot their words right through a crack in your shield and feel good about the argument ending only after they can’t imagine you getting up for more. I think instinctively they want to end all soul bonds they don’t want to deal with in their future lifetimes by “killing” the love so thoroughly that they will never have to breathe the same air with you again. Unfortunately for them:

This is more or less how the Normal Person* treat their loved ones – in order to create intimacy.

So many times the Normal Person* “True Emotion Mirrors” tell me proudly how they “challenge” their “True Emotion Mirror” by showing them “how they take no shit from them”, imagining this is attractive to their the Savants* thinking man, who, in reality, loses their respect in an instant toward a person who cannot live up to the basics of social decorum. The Savants* thinking males are gentlemen, philosophers, noble men who expect their women to have manners and similar ideals to themselves and treats testy, angry, disrespectful women instinctively like they would treat a peasant girl, with utter contempt. (The same goes for the Savants* thinking women, they regard ill-behaving people with similar distaste.) For this reason, for a Savants* to lower themselves to a full on fight with you, they no longer give a toss about what you think of them, they have lost their respect for you and care none for your opinion on them, as long as they can leave you in full knowledge of the depth of their contempt for you. The only thing that will stop them from going full on at a person like this now, is the presence of a fellow the Savants*, who they would not want to subject to such sight as an argument like this, and their shame of “having themselves seen behave this way” is comparable to being caught with their pants down. Should they continue this behavior in front of other the Savants*, particularly their True Emotion Mirrors , means that they trust fully in their relationship with these people and that they will be able to… quoting: “spend the rest of the eternity to beg for forgiveness for having behaved so badly” something they would, without hesitation, do for their the Savants* thinking True Emotion Mirrors .

How to deal with this

If you have managed to engage a Savants* into a fight with you, the only way back from that is for you to completely give up all your resistance and start listening to what the other is telling you while screaming at you. Trust me, they are trying to tell you something. To make sure they know that you heard them, use the old method of repeating what they said back to them with your own words, make sure you understood them correctly and respond. Two the Normal Person* fighting will find their way to the end result without my help, because this is natural for them, and Two the Savants* (or often one the Savants*, one-half one, half the other) will never get to this point (they might fight, fiercely, but they’ll sort things out or will never speak to each other again for months or years if ever. If the relationship mattered, man up. Also, if you always force the other one to be the one to apologize, think about reversing your strategy for someone you TRULY love, because they will pay attention to the fact they always need to take the higher ground with you, and eventually they will stop doing that).

Next

Read the rest of the series, there are more solutions packed in there than you can poke a stick at.

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*) Term changed after this post was originally written. Fractions of old terms may exist elsewhere in the post. Read about term updates.
**) Narcissists are Young Souls left alone to survive and they're doing their best. Their emotional age ranges from 3 to 17 -year old. The younger, the more severe the narcissism.

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