Why does “it” always happen once you stop looking? Love, that is.

So many people have had this experience in looking for love, that it feels like magic. It isn’t. There’s a perfectly good explanation to not looking leading to finding… Very soon.

The reason for this is that your energy and attitude changes when you stop obsessing about relationships. I’ve even heard of cases when someone marries someone they’re not crazy about, and 2 weeks after meeting what they’d call their soulmate. Two weeks seems to be the magic wait time.

First of all; Creepy

When you are consciously looking for a relationship, or, at least, you’re NERVOUSLY or OBSESSIVELY looking for a relationship, your energy is… Shall I call it “creepy”? You have this “grab you, lock you up, and then, you’re trapped” energy to you. NOBODY who doesn’t know you want to walk into a relationship that has already been decided on before you even know each other.

When you stop obsessing about HAVING TO bag yourself a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife, you start approaching people simply as HUMAN BEINGS, people to get to know. All of a sudden, you have TIME to GET TO KNOW people, instead of hitting a thousand Tinder likes a day, hoping one of them would lead to some kind of a mutually desperate relationship. You’ll make friends with these people, rather than have this “Submit to me instantly” energy about. You’ll be less dissatisfied, and rather than making this other person feel like they’ve WRONGED YOU for not wanting to date you, you’ll have an energy of “OK, you’re cool and interesting” about you, and there’s no pretense about it.

Love-starved love-blockers

There’s also another reason. When you are consciously looking for love or true love, you’re limiting yourself to ONE THING you’re looking for. Love is abundant, especially for people in the M8R10 category. It’s EVERYWHERE. So when you’re looking for love, there will be plenty of people offering it to you – it’s just not ALL that you’re looking for, is it?

You may be looking for SEXUAL fulfillment as well, and like love, it’s everywhere to be found. You can have completely fulfilling sexual relationships that profoundly fail to satisfy you, even if they were both romantic and committed, and monogamous to boot.

Even if you’re trying to explain to people, that you’re looking for intellectual people to love, it STILL won’t make sense to someone who is not quite smart as you are, but who think they are smart enough to love you. Therefore, the Normal Person* your internal dialogue: You’re looking for creative sexual partnerships, or whatever TRULY resonates with you. Make it offputting to those you don’t want; Weinstein them before you’ve got a company. 😉

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