No matter how much you love your kid, they’re not your True Emotion Mirror

Another major annoyance. It should not be a point of competition that you are your child’s True Emotion Mirror. This is akin to making a competition over being incestuous and potentially child-molesting parent. Although it CAN HAPPEN that a child and parent are each other’s True Emotion Mirrors, it is very much not what we’d generally speaking consider an ideal situation by any stretch of the imagination, as it will create an incestuous sexual relationship between a parent and a child. NOT BEING your child’s True Emotion Mirror doesn’t mean that you don’t love your child as much as a parent should. It being possible that a parent and a child might be True Emotion Mirrors to each other is something most people would like me to hush about and never even acknowledge the slight possibility of it happening.

The non-sexual, healthy ideal label to the same level but lacking the sexual and romantic aspects is a Precious Soulmate. You should never feel like you’re a bad parent if you have to agree that you don’t want to fuck your child. You should also not feel ashamed of the fact that True Emotion Mirrors love and SHOULD LOVE each other more than their child, because that child SHOULD have the right to grow up and love their own True Emotion Mirror more than they love their parent, and the parent should not feel cheated on if their child grows up and falls in love with someone other than their parent.

We MUST stop idolizing a mother’s love toward their child as “the height of all love”, as this idea can turn easily toxic and limiting to a child who has actually met their true love. It is NOT COOL for a parent to start competing over who loves their kid more, their True Emotion Mirror or themselves. That is toxic love, nothing to brag or boast about. A good parent shouldn’t feel the need to compete over the child’s love with their romantic partners at all, let alone their True Emotion Mirror.

This is not to discredit parent’s love for their child

Even though I am saying that True Emotion Mirror’s love is DIFFERENT to that between parents and children and that it includes another aspect that is missing from a parent-child -relationship; sexuality, I don’t mean, OBVIOUSLY, that parent’s love is meaningless or “weak”. (Me, personally, have a terrible relationship with my mother, but that is not to say that I believe all parent-child relationships are toxic simply because my mother and I have issues enough to write a 3-volume book about it. MY relationship with MY mother should not be an indicator as to what I feel about parents and children in general – and the fact I never wanted children myself shouldn’t be an indicator as to how I feel about parents or children in general.)

I understand that the love that one feels toward a child can be surprising to many new parents, how it happens out of the blue and so strongly. In fact, I was surprised and taken by a complete Mind Blown for the way I felt about my firstborn nephew. I knew when he was coming, even though he came early, I knew he was going to be a he despite people expecting a girl, I KNEW. When he was born, I felt a weight laid on my lap on the other side of the world – confirmed within 5 minutes of his birth. I feel an absolute connection to this one child, that I love with no sense, no explanation. Yet, he’s not MY child, and even though I felt this connection to him from day one, I never wanted a child of my own.

People’s children are often Precious Soulmates to their parents. Not always, but often. And that’s the amazing love you feel for your child. And the fact they’re not a True Emotion Mirror is a fucking good thing, alright? Not to say you don’t love your children correctly if you don’t consider them your #1 love, or if they, once adult, love someone other than you more than they love you.

When your child IS your True Emotion Mirror

Mind you. True Emotion Mirror love isn’t about child abuse and incest even when the child is their parent’s TrEmor. It will, obviously, also mean that the parent is their child’s True Emotion Mirror… (another point to clarify – a True Emotion Mirror isn’t your Valentine, either). True Emotion Mirror love won’t die because the child grows up. That’s when the love turns sexual, and that means a lot of weird shit happening between blood relatives. This is not a situation anyone wants to find themselves in, but it happens. Obey laws at all times, even if love hits between a parent and a child. (And mind you, incest is legal in many places between consenting adults, just FYI.)

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