Purify your soulmate circles gradually but intentionally

I haven’t truly tested this method, but I’m going to write this down anyway, as that’s what I do. The thought occurs to me and I write it. I believe this will work, but it will take practice to perfect, perhaps even years, as we’ve learned a different approach. Think this through and see how it feels. It will feel icky as h to begin with but think about it.

the Savants* have a tendency of being friendly to everybody. This is a result of always being the targets of one-sided love and thus guilt-tripping from the Normal Person*: “YOU have to pay attention to me, love me, give me things, teach me things, be my friend, be my ally, protect me from others, pay my rent because you’ve got so much, blah blah blah.” Then they use different strategies that prove how they need to be attended to.

Now. We heard. We did all those things. As a result, we became everybody’s best friends. And now, we’re all separated from each other, scattered around the globe like fucking good luck charms for people we don’t really care about. How to reverse this?

Only initiate contact with people who you LIKE and don’t mind AT ALL hanging out with

Stop being friendly to everybody. Certainly cut off TRYING to be super friendly, or stop trying to be generous with your time and effort, loving and caring of others beyond the point that it’s authentic. Let them find true love. You’re not what they’re looking for if they’re looking for true friends and true love, so you’re doing them a favor by not allowing them to get distracted by your amazing smile and body.

Follow people on social media purely based on how much you like them. Ignore communication from people who you don’t want to bond with, in business this will be a bit difficult, but it’s safe to assume that there are enough people you like in your category to profitably do business with them. By all means, sell stuff to anyone, just don’t be personally involved with anyone but those who you PERSONALLY feel like you’d like their attention.

Give attention to people you like EVEN IF you had no hope of them noticing you. This sends a LOA signal into the world; these are the people you’re interested in and willing to connect with. SHOWER interesting people with interest. Don’t fake being disinterested or hard to get. (That’s another story, too. Like we are all terrified of perfect people and tend to pretend not to be interested (desperate) to save face. It’s insecurity, not being cool or in control.)

Ignore actions that you don’t like

If you own a dog, you might have read a training principle of not punishing the dog but ignoring unwanted behavior and rewarding the dog when he STOPS doing what he is doing naturally. In people’s terms, let’s say you’ve got a friend or a colleague, who you like but don’t feel attracted to. They ask you out. Pretend like you didn’t hear it or that you didn’t get the email. If they ask you again, do the same thing or change the topic. Don’t say “I don’t know, maybe” nothing. Act as if you hadn’t heard them. Cheerily steer the discussion topic back to something safe and usual… Or, if you panic, notice that you “have to go”, even if you had to do it rather awkwardly. That should send the message. Next time, just pretend as if it never happened, if they don’t suggest you both should pretend it didn’t happen.

Also, never forget to make it obvious what kind of people you GENUINELY like and admire, no matter how different they were from the present company. Feel no guilt, and your present company doesn’t feel offended. If you see a negative move coming, “remember this one time when this guy/girl did this crazy thing…” and describe what you anticipate being on the way in a “can you believe some people” tone to encourage your company to NOT GO THERE.

It may feel even ruder still, but the other option is that you can’t have casual friends or colleagues at all for your own sake.

No more fake friends!!

No more pitty friends, time-waster friends, or calendar fillers. LEARN TO BE ALONE and go shopping and clubbing alone for as long as you need to. DO NOT associate being alone with being a loser. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You DO NOT NEED WRONG/FAKE FRIENDS, trust me. If you don’t love those people, you don’t love them. If you’d drop them on the spot if they get too much of a trouble for them, they’re a fake friend – or more importantly, YOU are a fake friend, and nobody needs a fake friend, not you, nor them.

Find the coolest places you know and have an access to and be there.

Stop pretending shit that matters doesn’t matter

Stop mincing your words. (I’m trying to learn this  myself but it’s so easy to be labeled an a-hole and …)

Learn to live with not being everybody’s favorite

This is the hardest part. People will dislike you. It will feel like shit. They will judge you, guilt you – even the people who you love and respect will pull a guilt trip on you, even if they were completely hypocritical in doing so. Make it socially acceptable to not be liked by everybody. Be an asshole. Accept yourself as someone who isn’t admired and adored and OK’d by everybody. Let them hate you for not liking them, even if the reason you didn’t like them was that they wear the size 14 or up instead of 10 or 12. I don’t care. You shouldn’t care. Nobody should care for anything but what is REAL. Truth.

And stop telling people lies about how well-liked they are… When they’re not.

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