A few warnings before you open your psychic abilities.

If you can get a full-blown psychosis by dangling a pointy rock on a string, one of two possibilities is true: You’re actually dealing with the forces of the other realm, or our grasp to sanity is as secure as an unboiled egg on a ledge, possibly broken by a mere suggestion of the non-existing supernatural. The fact is, you CAN get a full-blown “psychosis” from dangling a pointy rock on a string. I’ve done it.

Them pointy rock pendants are dangerous.

My naivety.

When I first opened my psychic abilities with the help of a pendulum, the said pointy rock on a string, I was reading through a few warnings about what a pendulum will do to your life. Unfortunately, “my spirit guides” didn’t read them as warnings but rather wishes; what it was that I was intending to achieve, such as losing all of my privacy. This sounds INSANE because it is.

There are people who fear that they are not accepted the way they are, therefore, they want to CHALLENGE others to view them in all of their ugliness to test their acceptance and unconditional love. While this never occurred to me that anyone would WANT TO lose their privacy, my so-called spirit guides thought that was the very thing I was after: seeking the people in my life that would never leave me and who would forgive me for being sexual, for instance.

Ten years on, I realize my moronic mom thought I WANTED HER to be watching me suck cock, making comments all the way through every occasion of such.

Needless to say, I do not wish for you to have to go through that.

Consider the risks.

If everything goes well, your psychological diagnosis in 3 months’ time will be “an acute psychosis” or “schizophrenia”. While you are likely to be able to handle this with relative ease, there are people who will genuinely consider you mentally ill. The condition won’t heal itself until you’re done with your experimentation. However, it will be easier to handle, when you know exactly “how you went insane”.

Your spiritual environment will consist of the people you interact with. Toxic people result in toxic “spirit guides”. In some other soul group, you may be the demon among them. And also, the “spiritual team” you’ll find is hand-picked to your needs, and what that means for you is a little unpredictable to me, but not to you.

Your spirit guides are the people who consider themselves your best friends… Noooot the other way around.

If you feel like there are people in your life who don’t truly understand you, you will run into SURPRISING situations through the use of a pendulum. They simply interpret what you do and try to achieve by using a pendulum in the most obscure ways. My blog is mainly a result of me dissecting the thousands of ways people interpret the same situations: if I yell at them, they may think I try to test whether they would “withstand my fire” and stick around regardless like a True Emotion Mirror is wanted to, while in truth you WANT TO chase them out of your life.

Ironically, THE MORE YOU NEED TO DO THIS, the bigger a load of crap is going to be that is expecting you on the other side.

I often ask myself if I would have done this if I would have known what was going to happen, and honestly, although I think this is the best thing I’ve done for myself if I had KNOWN… I don’t think I would have done it. The BULLSHIT that followed was WAY beyond anything I was warned against. REVOLTING. Then again, the BENEFITS also exceeded my expectations by a million miles. I am HAPPY I did this, but if I had known… I mean, I don’t know what you’ll be facing. What I went through may be an extreme case. Maybe it was a walk in the park compared to what you are going to be faced with if you choose to go there.

The number one goal is to get the parents out of the bedroom.

To me, everything else about this was kind of OK, except the fact both of my parents and family members were in spirit with me AT ALL TIMES. It’s been 10 years and counting, and they’re still here. The problem is, that I didn’t realize what was keeping them here, (and I haven’t yet explained this to them, either) is that I believed they had NO CHOICE in the matter, and that’s why they stuck around like that. Why WOULD THEY stay here if they had a choice, right? How would they disrespect me in that way, if they had a choice?

In reality, they always had a choice. They could have left but they thought I WANTED THEM to stay. They thought me thinking “you don’t have a choice” means “if you want to prove to me that you love me, you have no other choice but to stay and watch me fuck random men off the Internet so I know you accept me for what I’m ashamed of.” For the record, my sexuality is THE ONE THING that I don’t have a fucking issue with. I am not ashamed of it, I do not have sexual hangups, and the last thing I needed was a sexual fucking intervention from my fucking friends and family.

HOWEVER. It did force me to look into everyone’s fucked up sex-brain. It TAUGHT ME so much about people and THEIR hangups that I figure the torture was worth it. After all, if I TRUST ANYTHING in myself it is my sexuality. My balanced view on it. I am not sure if there would have been anyone more CAPABLE of taking on that much CRAP on their sex life and not being traumatized forever by it.

At the end of the day, I wasn’t the one who was asking for help, I was the one who was being trained TO HELP. And, to help, I had to understand their problems, sexual and otherwise. Hence 24/7 surveillance of every thought that popped into my head by everyone I’ve ever known. IMAGINE THAT. That is what is possible.

You already know what your challenge is going to be.

I wanted to understand everything. I also have always HAD THIS NEED for 100% openness and non-secrecy, while I never truly wanted MY PARENTS involved. *Gag* To ME, it was never about my friends and family but about my romantic relationships, but given the chance, they pushed their way in. I also wanted to CLEAR MY WAY from the ground up. I wanted “this BULLSHIT to be over.” Therefore, every fucken issue imaginable got dragged out of the dim corners of my brain out into the light, and if it makes sense, it’s been both TRAUMATIC and THERAPEUTIC at the same time. The stuff that caused a trauma will heal itself, but it’s like cutting your stomach open for a life-saving operation, the wound will heal, but the cancer is cured.

So. Examine yourself. Do you want to do this? You WILL BE in charge, IN SOME WAY. It will be a challenge that YOU DICTATE, even if it may surprise you how fucked up it’s going to get. I want you to examine your ambitions. What do you want? And mind you, there’s no “partial” acceptance of the challenge. It’s all of what you want or nothing. You can’t pick and choose and hope for an easier ride unless you AUTHENTICALLY just want someone to tell you “everything is going to be fine”.

What you want will be given to you. But be careful what you TRULY DEEPLY WISH FOR, because that is actually the very thing you will get. The game will be rigged to YOUR GOALS. And once you hit the start button, you won’t get off the ride until you’re done, no matter how shit it will get.

Are you ready to visit Hyi Vittu?

It will be awful.

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