Allow yourself to face reality and your true feelings; reduce fear and worry by feeling it

We are often told “don’t worry” and “fear not”. I say allow yourself to worry, allow yourself to fear. We’re being told “don’t waste your time on anger”, I say be angry when you’re angry. Feel those feelings freely, allow yourself to feel what is true. Face reality as it is, and don’t forget that a good chunk of reality is fantastic. We’re also told not to look at the world through rose-colored glasses, to don’t live in fantasy land… And that makes us reject all of that magic that truly exists in this world. The true reality is a mixture of things, some near-magical, some rather rubbish. Allow yourself to see the full spectrum of light and dark. All the shades of gray, and all the colors of the rainbow.

When you try and avoid certain feelings, you tend to make them worse, not better. You focus on not worrying, but the source of worry will not get processed and dealt with. You try to avoid feeling over-worked by avoiding work, and lo and behold, you create a backlog of work. Then you go on and avoid feeling sexual desire for the people you feel sexual desire for, and you go gradually mad. 😉 You try not to smother your children with your over-pour of emotion, and you can’t truly express your feelings toward them at all, rendering you a ball of pain and your children feel nothing but cold from you.

If you’re not in touch with your true feelings and your reality, your spirit guides won’t be, either

Your spirit guides are working with the information you give them. If you keep dodging your true feelings, they can’t help you much. They’ll go by your own idea of what is the truth, and plan things accordingly. If you lie to yourself, you also lie to your spirit guides. This hinders your manifestation power and you become unluckier as a result.

You’re never completely unaware of your true feelings

I want you to know, too, that you’re never completely unaware of your true feelings. I want to say this because it can feel worrying to believe that you could have suppressed your feelings so completely that you have no awareness of them at all. Personally, I do not believe that this is possible. It would also be a too easy tool to use to manipulate others, along the lines of “you must be gay because I’m attracted to you, but you’re only suppressing your feelings because you’re homophobic.” I do not believe suppressing your emotions to that level to be possible, but there’s always some nagging feeling somewhere that you’re lying to yourself about something.

Stop repeatedly touching unpleasant feelings

Yet, I also must say this. When you’ve explored and poked and prodded a feeling that doesn’t seem to go anywhere, stop touching it. This could be a source of continued argument with someone, or something else, usually involving another person. When this feeling doesn’t resolve by exploring it, stop touching it, as the other person may think you ENJOY this feeling and keep giving you that feeling because they get your attention with it.

I find the expression “stop touching the feeling” helpful, as when your hand feels pain, you pull your hand away. The same way you can stop wallowing in an unhelpful feeling by pulling your attention away from it; stop touching it.

Still, do this only after you realize this is truly an unresolvable feeling – which seem to also exist.

You should instantly feel calmer by allowing yourself to worry and do the work

As an example, if you keep avoiding feeling worried, trying to think positive and be brave, you easily stop yourself from seeing the reality of the situation and solving the problems you need to solve in order to make the source of worry go away; very commonly; money problems. Allow yourself to accept that everything is not fine, you need to do your bookkeeping, and you need to get on top of your bills, manage that stuff. You need to crunch the numbers, you need to get to that stuff that you may feel you’d rather avoid.

You may feel that reality will kill your dream, so you will rather try it, but you will not go anywhere because you haven’t checked with reality if it’s possible… So you doubt yourself even when you don’t have to.

You have to make it clear to yourself if you are even in the ballpark of possibly going to be making it, or if you’re living in a dream world. That should reduce your stress levels dramatically when you just allow yourself to doubt it… Or to see if “a little success” is enough to pay the bills.

(Write the god damned business plan.)

Then, the other extreme

Having said that, there’s also a danger of over-worrying. When you start worrying for the sake of worrying, so you feel you’re more prepared than what you actually are. Doing this has probably made us tell each other to not worry, and to avoid needless worrying because it is quite a horrifying feeling to worry TOO MUCH. There’s always a balance to be made about everything. ALLOW yourself to worry, don’t force yourself to worry. Don’t ENCOURAGE yourself to worry; allow yourself to worry… Or whatever other feeling is pushing through.

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