Crazy-hot-ratio is a delicate balance that requires mastery

There are both men and women who play with this crazy-hot scale. They simply play it a little differently. What is common for both genders, tho, is that it is a skill that needs mastery, and there is a point when your ‘mouse’ can say: “They’re just a little too far on the crazy side of the crazy-hot ratio” and you’re done and out. It may seem like the EASY way to play; you just act up and make them beg for more, but it is not that simple. It is your job to have a keen eye on your partner’s limits and ride the wave between pleasure and pain for them; emotionally and sexually speaking. It’s not easy.

First, you have to learn the generic member of the opposite gender; in practicality, polygynous women or polyandrous men (or polygynandrous either, who are rarely problematic in any situation). Then, you hit on a polyandrous woman or a polygynous man, and you’ll hit the wall… Hard. The truth is tho, that if you’re either type, you don’t really lose anything, but it may hit your ego.

Your strategy is supposed to make them feel good.

The point of this strategy is often missed by many who attempt it; you’re not there being all wild and free for no reason; you’re there to play with their emotions; to make THEM feel good. You’re supposed to play them like a fiddle, and it requires a lot of empathy and playful care for your partner. On the outside, it looks sadistic, but at the core of it, if you’re good at it, there’s the pleasure-giver, just like in BDSM; the object of the action is the one bound, and their pleasure must be the dominant’s pleasure, the dominant is responsible for mutual pleasure. It is far easier to be the one driven crazy rather than the driver, and those who try either thinking being in the dominant position is the easy way out haven’t really understood how it works at all… And any success is purely coincidental, based on the fact people are different, not on the fact you know what you’re doing.

Having said that, if you truly act from your authentic self, you can’t really go wrong with anything, but if you play this as a strategy and don’t know what you’re doing, you’re going to lose your True Emotion Mirror with this, not win them over… Goes for every love game ever played without knowledge and mastery.

Sensitivity toward the individual… Unless they have a weak self-esteem.

This strategy, to work on anyone, requires a very vast understanding of people, a keen eye on the individual you’re playing with, and a willingness to go the extra mile for their pleasure. USUALLY, these strategies ONLY work on insecure people who have very little pride in who they are and how they should be treated, EVEN IF they were good-looking. With a person who has high self-confidence and who know their own worth, these games are almost impossible to play. ALMOST. A very skilled, top-of-the-pack individual can certainly learn to play their equals like a fiddle, but they DO NEED TO know the ins and outs of that individual and play them accordingly. Whatever level you play at, you have to know the limits of the person you play with, and you have to know them instinctively or through examination over time… Sometimes a conversation is an answer, but many players think that’s cheating or boring – and in some way, I agree. A MASTER shouldn’t need to ask.

The reason why this works for people who have low self-esteem is that they have no pride and they believe bad treatment is what they deserve. Therefore, they think this person KNOWS IT, and they’re still interested, so they grab hold of the little love they can get hoping their submission will eventually win their abuser over… But people with low self-esteem are not the only ones who WOULD LIKE these games IF played right.

You gotta know how to change tact or pace.

If you fancy yourself a good player, you have to know how to change tact, pace, or cue in a non-player that you want to play a game with them. YOUR JOB as a player is not only to get your kicks like a lot of beginners think; YOUR JOB is make THEM feel entertained, excited, and sexy – and better about themselves than what they did before they met you… not the other way around. Fucking up “because you’re a player” is NOT a good excuse. If you’re a player, you don’t fuck up. Only stupid kids who don’t know what the ef they’re doing fuck up.

I don’t particularly LIKE players and playing because people are so fucking bad at it, but if you’re going to do it, at least have the decency to be good at it and know how to play with INDIVIDUALS, not with ENTIRE GENDERS.

With people who have self-respect, you make one mistake you don’t have the insight to correct, and you’re out.

While people who have low self-esteem will accept an explanation that has no basis in reality just to keep you, a person who knows their own worth will not let you let yourself off the hook if you f*** up. They won’t value you trying to put the blame on them, as you’d do with a person with low self-esteem. They require you to take ownership, and if you refuse… Well. You’ve played your final card and lost.

Why jealousy games don’t work on a high-quality individual

Jealousy games are titillating for people who have an ego boost to get from it. “Oh, you’re playing with THAT person, too? OMG, I wonder if I measure up to them. Can I be more exciting to him/her than THAT sexy person? Wow! I can’t believe I’m playing in the same league as him/her!” And this can be nuances, right? It can be a rock star to rock star, but if you try to make a rock star lead singer jealous by dangling a bass player in his face… That ain’t going to work! The lead singer of his favorite band, or the lead guitarist of the same band, sure, you’ve got a play, but trying to make him jealous with a bass player… Nuhhuh. That’s not how you do it.

When a person is proud of themselves and knows others see them that way, too, they go: “Oh boy. If you can’t tell the difference and make up your mind between the lead singer and the fucking bass player, you better go with the fucking bass player; obviously, I’m too good for you.” (There is a thing here, tho. If you can point out to them WHY the bass player is equal or potentially superior to your other guy, then you’re back in the game. Still, you have to know his metrics. You’d be making a mistake if you think he’ll agree that they might be equals because the other guy’s dad bought him a more expensive car than your other guy has if he values creativity, intelligence, and a way with words rather than money. And again, you’d be showing your ignorance, not your titillating ability to get anyone you want, if you’d only make up your mind.)

Mind you; not everyone who is openly polyamorous and lowers their bar sometimes does it to play games. Then YOUR game has gotten to you; if you pretend not to care, they might have believed you.

Why does acting like you don’t care doesn’t work on a humble (non-playing) person

Acting like you don’t care works for entitled people and people with weak egos. They have to fly in and insist you give them the attention they think they deserve. Their self-respect depends on YOUR appreciation of them, right? A humble person, however, someone with good self-esteem will see this as your inability to make up your mind or as your genuine disinterest in them, and they figure “your life, your heart, your call.” Then, they’ll hang out with someone they CAN HAVE instead of hanging onto people who don’t seem to give them the time of their day.

If you pretend that you don’t care, there are people who will believe you or at least let you make up your mind based on whatever reasons you may have.

You realize not everyone plays love games, right? And with non-players, these strategies are so fucking wasted, this one and the jealousy approach in particular, because they’ll just think, “Oh, he/she likes that person more. Oh well. Plenty of fish in the sea.”

Unquestioned dominance

Then, there are strategies that are designed to work on the feeble of mind and self-esteem: establishing unquestioned dominance, even when you’re way off and completely stupid. This plays on the idea that you insist on them that you can do no wrong, and their job is to simply accept it. A very lazy way to dominate, by the way, requires NOTHING from you except blind stubbornness, which is a very, very unattractive quality in a person in the eyes of anyone with a level of self-respect and good social skills on their part, as they cannot understand why THEY should accept your idiotic behavior as superior, simply because you say so and you think you’re hot enough to get away with it. *Yawn*

This works on people who are super insecure in their relationships and have NO IDEA how they should be conducted. Therefore, they relax with a person willing to make all the decisions for them, and simply tag along like a mindless drone.

Male-female roles.

This is a funny one. There are people who “play” with the idea of male and female roles in marriage and society. They find their partner from someone who demonstrates their understanding of what their role is in a marriage solely based on their gender. I personally find this actually FUNNY, as it actually makes me laugh at these people, but I find the whole game absolutely stupid and outdated. Personally.

Anyway, the idea is that both partners dominate in their own areas of marriage, and they perform this dance -a kind of role decision where they “pretend” to play but don’t, really. He complains about taking out the trash, she pretends to care, and then he takes out the trash pretending like it’s a big thing to show her he loves her. But if you don’t play this game yourself and don’t know it IS a game, you’d just find it mind-bogglingly stupid you have to mention the trash Every God Damned Time.

Interpreting people AS IF they were players is also a stumbling block you need to learn to avoid.

As a master player, you also need to know not everybody plays games. These people are what they are, and they say what they think; they think as they act, and that’s it. They give you the whole 9 yards of information on how to treat them off the gates and expect you to say “yes” or “no” to it. If you think they are PLAYING with their list, you’ll just make a mess out of their lives and achieve nothing. You’ll annoy the daylights out of them and just get in their way, and you gain NO POINTS for being “crazy,” “uncontrollable,” or unable to understand the spoken or written language.

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