False ego is the stories you tell yourself about yourself and your standing with other people so the truth wouldn’t hurt so much

“Ego”, without the definition of “false” means your idea of who you are; the complex sum of who you are when you say “I”. Your idea of yourself. Your understanding of yourself. NOT having an ego is impossible, unless you blend into the Universe and forget you exist. False ego is different. It is the part of your idea of yourself that is NOT TRUTHFUL. It is the sum of the lies you tell yourself about yourself and your standing with other people so that you could cope with your displeasure of yourself.

Often this false ego consists of the idea that the more wealth you’ve got, the more people will respect you. This is far from the truth, but a lot of people have that belief in them. There are TONS of lies people tell themselves about themselves and others, tho. One of the most destructive and dangerous ones is when you DO NOT have ANY OTHER EXPLANATION for other people’s behavior toward you than “they’re secretly so much in love with me…” Or “they’re jealous of me” “They fear me”, etc. There’s also the trouble that sometimes people ARE jealous of others, sometimes they fear others, and sometimes they’re secretly in love with other people and people they’re not supposed to be in love with, but if you cannot POSSIBLY envision another kind of explanation than “they all love me”, then more than likely it’s your false ego talking, not the truth.

We all get a balance of love and hate. Adoration and mere acceptance. Some people will merely approve of you, while others love you and admire you. The more dissimilar you are to another person, the more likely it is that their feelings toward you are something other than adoration. Even if you are the beauty queen with a PHD, there are people who feel pitty for you for being “such a high achiever that you’ll never get to live” and whatever – but the truth is… People have a lot of false ego toward highly successful people. They, of course, believe YOU have an ego, thinking you’re better than them but… Whatever measure anyone uses.

It is, however, the easiest way to measure your false ego: How important do you think you are to a person who is nothing like you? My bet is not very. THEY in their turn, think that you’re friendly to them because you want to be more like them. And EVERYONE feels authentically surprised that someone who isn’t like them wouldn’t wish to be. WE ARE ALL that much of narcissists. If we DIDN’T THINK our own way of being isn’t ideal, WE WOULD FIND A WAY TO CHANGE. Guaranteed.

So. We are all our own display of perfection. No matter what part of the ladder you sit on, which fence you sit on, what combination of perfection vs. imperfection you feel is perfection, YOU are YOUR OWN idea of perfection, and so is everybody else. MOST PEOPLE have this falsehood in their ego: “You and I both agree I’m superior to you.” This is categorically NOT TRUE ONLY between True Emotion Mirrors.¹

Philosophically, you can understand that each person sees themselves as the ideal and that there’s no reason to pity someone because they’re not you. A king on the throne has no need to feel sorry for the coal miner, who is PROUD AS FUCK about himself and the tough work he does. He would NEVER trade places with a king. They might HATE the king for various reasons, SUCH AS for looking down at the miner, FOR NO CONCEIVABLE REASON WHATSOEVER. But the king has his reasons to be contemptuous or feel sorry for the miner. It is the miner’s false ego telling HIM that the king has no reason to. It works both ways. Only a person who sees this can see themselves and their standing clearly; you’re nobody’s hero but your own and people very similar to you. And even if you were the hero, the others around you would rather be themselves than you. 😉

People who try to be someone they’re not, however, have a false ego in fearing that others don’t really appreciate them the way they are. This is people who try to be better people to please others, to be more lovable than what they’d otherwise be. STILL, there are people who are naturally drawn to philosophy, music, arts, science, intellectual pursuits of all description, and it has NOTHING to do with TRYING to impress others even though it is impressive. This means people who try to change themselves for religious, moral, and philosophical reasons, to be more modest, down to earth, more attentive of the little people – you name it. THAT too, is false ego, with the belief they’d be more loved and appreciated and less envied if they did.

Once you understand this, it will stop you from messing other people’s lives in your misguided intent of “helping them”, and “protecting them”. You’ll stop making fake friends for your false ego, you will no longer feel sorry for people who don’t bask in your glorious approval. They’ll still fight their own ego, trying to make YOU understand how they are better than you even though you think they’re less than you, but trust me, that’s a lose-lose path. (I spent 10 years fighting that monster on a daily basis. Those morons still think they’re better than me. 😉 And I still think I’m better than them. But I do take a win from KNOWING that regardless of my ambitions, I understood why THEY DID NOT WANT TO be me. But I do think I’m better than them, for sure.)

Now, let me repeat one more thing: When people change their ideals, they will begin to change. Therefore, admiring someone dissimilar to you gives you another GOAL to go for. If you realize this, you don’t have a false ego, at least not there. More than likely your false ego lies elsewhere; does that person love you? Would they? How much work did it take for them to be who they are? Are you willing to put in that effort yourself?

Making friends with someone who is dissimilar to you will change both of you – for the better or for the worse is a question of who likes being themselves more… and how authentic is that friendship in the end.

There.

1. Don’t get confused by this, as I’m stating the bleeding obvious to some people: I mean the True Emotion Mirrors who are in love with EACH OTHER, not all people who have a True Emotion Mirror… This means NOT by the definition of: “I have a True Emotion Mirror, therefore I am a True Emotion Mirror, and all True Emotion Mirrors, whomever they might be in love with see each other as the ideal.” NOT like that. Members of the same True Emotion Mirror soup feel each other to be perfect, too. ↩

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