Follow your instinct and inner guidance; Follow a sacrifice or a feel good -factor?

The reason why a lot of people interpret life advice very differently is that our values and morals are very different by a natural alingment. Situations change and the same rule doesn’t apply anymore. I write my theories expecting the reader to be mature enough to apply these texts in their lives in a way that helps them to gain a happier life, not in a way that makes them less happy while they make others around them happier: if one person requires another to sacrifice themselves for them, that person gets something they don’t deserve, and if everyone lives a life of sacrifice, nobody is ever going to be happy. However. To some people, sacrifice is the very thing love is made out of, but don’t waste sacrifice on people who don’t see it as nothing but a guilt trip on them.

“Do what feels right/good” is an advice that the Old Souls* and the Young Soul* see very differently. Is it “what is expected of me” or “what feels good to me”? “Do the right thing” usually means you are leaning towards doing something selfish that will hurt others, while “do what feels right” is a 50-50 situation with no right or wrong answer and you are free to choose either option, however you feel is the right choice for you personally.

However. If you ask ME, personally, I would ALWAYS say this: Never do anything that you KNOW will make you unhappy in the long run if the choice doesn’t bring you what you expect it to bring, for example, to not go to a school out of state expecting that choice to finally make your parents appreciate you more. Assume they won’t. If you’re trying to gain the respect of a Old Souls* thinking parent by shooting yourself in the leg you’ve got another thing coming. If you see your loved ones never sacrificing themselves for you, don’t expect them to love you more if you sacrifice yourself for them. They will love you for thriving. They will love you for going after your dreams and fulfilling them.

My mother lived her good years working at a bank. When she was young, she used to work at a cafe, and she ALWAYS dreamed about opening a bakery-cafe, and periodically, she brought this dream up in a conversation, and we always told her to do it. I suggested she’d open a cafe next to my school, or, perhaps she did, I am not sure, but I remember how I loved that idea. LOVED it. I tried to talk her into opening it, but she always wanted me to work with her, and I didn’t want to, cafe was HER dream not mine, and the fact I didn’t sign up for a life as a coffee maker, which, to me, would have been all talent wasted -scenario, a kick to the gut, and a life spent in my personal hell, I wanted her to do it, because to her, that was a dream come true. I would have liked to spend a year or two at it, but not my entire life, but she’d think it would be amazing if I kept the cafe going after her passing, I’m sure.

She could have started it with someone else she loved, but she was hung up on me being her business partner. She wanted me to sacrifice myself in order to make her dreams come true, and that’s just not how I operate. I also do not want her to sacrifice her dreams for my happiness; I wanted her to have that cafe… Just not at my expense. I wanted to make enough money too, to finance the start of her cafe, but since I’m still banging my own head aganst the wall trying to make my dreams come true, hers are not looking good considering her age… Maybe it’s not too late yet.

What is right, is to not hurt others while you make your own dreams come true. (You may not always be aware of how you hurt others, though, which is forgivable, but you might want to be aware of it, nonetheless.) The irony is, that what hurts one person is the opposite to what hurts another, and the way one person feels loved and cared for is the way another feels oppressed and violated… So it is never easy to do the right thing by others, but what you CAN DO is to do the right thing by yourself. Aim to do the right thing by those who you TRULY  care about, and in addition to that, make sure you don’t make sacrifices you’ll have to make another person responsible for later, if things don’t go the way you wanted them to go… also, try not to be the person others can blame when their life goes to ruin… Simply because you wouldn’t listen to them, take them seriously, or care about what they wanted because what they wanted wasn’t what you wanted.

As for my theories; They are there as a suggestion; Have you ever thought about this possibility? Could it be, that in your life, this might be an issue or the situation? In your True Emotion Mirror relationship, perhaps that is the key problem you’ve failed to see. I will NEVER EVER take responsibility of trying to force people into doing something they don’t want to do, because that goes against EVERYTHING I believe in. However, I do own the responsibility of forcing people to accept the fact that they are not always loved by everyone who they are in love with, and that not all family members always love each other – because that is a simple fact of life all grown ups should be able to accept as such. Also, what you must understand about Your Dreams or your ideal life is that it is YOU we are talking about. We are not talking about your dreams regarding your child’s future or your dreams regarding to your supposed True Emotion Mirror, but YOU as an individual. You cannot have your dreams regarding another person come true if they do not share your dreams. That, also should go without saying to a grown up individual. If you’re lucky, your dreams are in alignment with the people you love, but I am in no way, shape or form, going to take part in attempts to help you change someone’s mind about being a party to the makings of your individual dreams and making them into your fucking bitch in this life.

So. That’s where we begin.

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