For you to claim you love someone unconditionally based on them not loving you back, stop expecting them to love you back for the virtue of loving them.
Now, I do say there is no such thing as unconditional love in the sense that your love ignites under certain conditions, and therefore, there are always conditions to love. However, there are people who are looking for unconditional love and believe everyone else is, too. People who are particularly looking for unconditional love are people who do not want to do anything to win someone’s love. The less they have to do to be loved, the better they feel, and they often start throwing in the towel to see how much further they can go before the love stops coming.
However, if your definition of unconditional love is “I don’t need you to love me back,” there are some conditions to consider this as “unconditional love.” Do you still expect your love to be rewarded somehow? You may love them now, but isn’t there an expectation of some sort? You wish them to love you back, appreciate your love, at least? Give you an opportunity to be in their lives, even if you’re only an observer. You want something for yourself from that love, no? Their presence, if nothing else?
No. Unconditional love, by the definition of “you don’t need to love me back,” lets go of the loved one. It says: “I love you even though you don’t love me back. I love you even if I cannot be the one to make you happy. My love doesn’t diminish if you don’t allow me to be in your life. I will not stand in the way of your happiness and life because I love you (in either meaning of the sentence).”
A fan loves their idol unconditionally in the sense of “even though you don’t love me back.” “You don’t have to be in my life, know I exist, or react to me or my love; I love you regardless.”
To actually love unconditionally, as a pure reaction to that person, you have to learn to give up on a future with this person, not get angry, but STILL love that person.
Do you actually love that person, or do you rather love the action of being the person capable of loving someone else so one-sidedly? Are you, in fact, in love with your own self, admiring your own reflection rather than theirs?
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*) Term changed after this post was originally written. Fractions of old terms may exist elsewhere in the post. Read about term updates.
**) Narcissists are Young Souls left alone to survive and they're doing their best. Their emotional age ranges from 3 to 17 -year old. The younger, the more severe the narcissism.
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