I call the True Emotion Mirror connection the True Emotion Mirror bond. It is a combination of two things: 100% compatibility in all areas (what both of us are not, we are more than willing to become) and incarnational history. The first is more important than the latter. (This post doesn’t apply to Lovers’ Choice Soulmates*, to whom only history is important, compatibility not so much at all.) 

Some typical fears a person feels when they become aware of their True Emotion Mirror:

• I am going crazy.
• I am going to make a fool out of  myself.
• I am being deceived, played, coaxed into something that might hurt me in the end.
• A bit too good to be true. Too easy. Too… neat.
• They are a master manipulator, I can’t see a flaw.
• They’re so hot they must be ugly inside. Nobody is really as cool as he/she seems…
• I cannot do anything about this, what I wish for is uncertain, what I have is certain; my wishes are immoral or selfish.
• I feel more lust than love, I am overpowered by sexual desire. It won’t last.
• They seem to be everything I have ever wished for… How much of this is made up?
• The connection is so intense and powerful it cannot be considered permanent. It will erupt soon.
• If I will give into this, it will change everything. I will be completely consumed by this. My life will never be the same again.
• I will probably anger some people if I go into this. This is so not good on paper. How many friends / colleagues / fans will I lose over this?
• There are probably other options out there… Should I be looking for someone with whom my relationship is a little bit more sensible…?

The idea of complete and utter happiness is a scary one. To go after it seems ludicrous. To admit to oneself that… No matter how old you are, you are still a romantic fool and wish for things that a grown up should have given up a long time ago – or at least know what it looks like when it arrives… It is incredibly difficult to admit that you wish someone to make you happy, to fill all your dreams. When the True Emotion Mirror arrives, they even seem to fulfill dreams you didn’t know you had… Or would have ever admitted having. 

It is a lot to take in, and often, these feelings arrive at the same exact time as you meet this person for the first time. You’re standing eye-to-eye to someone who you feel you’ve known all your existence, and you have but a split second to make up your mind about what to do about it. Most of us, famous or not, will decide to keep walking. “Today is not the day you will fall in love.” You will tell yourself because it is something you have been wishing for your whole life, and 365 days a year you have been proven that today is not the day, so why would this day be any different to the countless of other today’s you’ve lived through? Somehow, the magical day always looms just out of your reach in the near future.

Your mind starts making rational excuses for your fear to hang onto: “True love doesn’t exist.” “Oh well her nose is, kind of… Huge. She can’t be my perfect girl.” “I’ve been hurt before, I don’t want to put myself through that again.” “I am probably just over-reacting to a sexy individual, I mean… who wouldn’t be?” “I’ll just walk away… because… It’s a dumb idea anyway.”

Taking the risk

The thing is… If this was a NORMAL relationship, you wouldn’t hesitate to reach out and check this baby out. They’re hot, right? They seem cool. What’s the harm in asking? And yet, when you think about THIS person, you feel like saying “hi” would be so overly eager they’d die laughing. “What? Marry you? Now?!” If you try to make a little sense out of your own fear of approaching someone, you would notice that if they were just a normal person to you, you could… Do a whole lot more than just stand there with your mouth open thinking of reasons not to approach. If you knew the opportunity doesn’t repeat for another year or two, would that make you move faster? Not with him/her, not with anyone? Probably not. (Personally, that thought terrifies me to petrification, not to action, because I feel like I’d be constantly unprepared for it.)

Sometimes it is best (and very endearing) if you just stumble your way through a first contact. Sometimes, the difficulty is the second contact, after a moment that was so intense and undeniable that you don’t know what to say, and to save face (with yourself) you’ll start coming up with those excuses again… At first, it will be: “I doubt they’re as cool as I think they are” then, when their coolness is 100% established to be real, the argument changes: “Well, I’m not really that cool, am I? I would, probably, be a bit of a disappointment if they got to know me…”

Playtime; If you can stall a bit while you’re working up the nerve, try to calm yourself and think… Can I get a phone number without making it too obvious what I want so I can call them later under some poorly veiled excuse? Can I somehow invite them somewhere where I can make a smoother move on my own turf? Can I make someone else do the talking Steven Tyler style under the guise of causing too much attention if I did it myself…?

Don’t overlook your own positive traits

I will be returning to the topic of True Emotion Mirrors and fame too many times for you to stomach, I’m sure, but… Here is what you probably have been TRAINED not to do. Your entire life you have, probably, worked extra hard to ignore your positive traits and play up those of others. It’s called modesty. The more fans you’ve got, the less you are allowed to be aware of how attractive you really are, to the point where you are beaten into the belief you are nothing special, just lucky.

Let’s quit doing that. I do not ask you to get egotistical, or to start making things up, just be realistic. Just LEARN to be realistic first. If you were in their shoes, what would you see? Would you come off as someone who is too cool to be spoken to or too cool to talk to others? Too self-important? Thinks themselves being so good-looking, rich, and famous that they expect others to suck up to them all the time? Yeah, so talk to people. 😉

Then… When we are talking about someone super attractive, that you, realistically, know is not lacking in propositions… Think about this: How far are you willing and able to go to make them happier than anyone else would be able to make them? Quite honestly, when I was aiming to snatch my True Emotion Mirrors (on the soul level) all I was thinking was to get them for 5 years for the next lifetime before they’d go back to their actual True Emotion Mirror… It took me a while to realize that they had decided, wholeheartedly, that they were not going to go anywhere…

This, however, must be an authentic action. Forcing yourself to do something that YOU do not consider to be YOU to make someone fall for you is not going to work in the long term, a lot of people have tried. Particularly when it is your True Emotion Mirror – they love you for you, and whenever you’re trying to be someone “better” for them, you’ll ruin the perfection that is your match…

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