There are two types of people: those who view these identity labels as descriptive words, that help us communicate what we are and what makes us happy, and those, who take them as limiting and separating labels that create unnecessary complications in their lives. I am, again, talking about the Old Souls* and the Young Soul*, respectively. These labels and terms are really helpful only for the Old Souls*, who freaking love them and live harmoniously with them, but the Young Soul* should just refuse to think about them. Basically, the only thing the Young Soul* should be asking is: “Do you know if you’re ‘a pansexual’ or not?” “Oh, yes, I’m not, I’m a….” and they should say: “OK, bye! I don’t deal with labels.”

the Young Soul* tend to want to attach ALL labels to themselves or none at all. They don’t like to choose sides and be divided by any of that stuff. They want inclusion and acceptance from everybody they’re dealing with, and they see these labels as being a barrier to that inclusion. They may also interpret the label as a “ticket to be included,” as we are often talking about “inclusion” simultaneously with identity politics, kind of like “once you have one of these labels that need to be included, you get to be included, but if you remain straight CIS, you’ll be excluded.” But when you assign a label to yourself, you’re simultaneously separating yourself from the majority and those who don’t share that label. The Young Soul* should thus take only ONE label, the Young Soul*, and hang out with other the Young Soul* and be done with it. The Young Soul* also don’t mind if you’ve “faked it” in other groups prior; the Old Souls* find it a little suspicious; “turn coat-y.” The problem is that this term is far from widely used as of writing this. (If you like, you can check out my the Young Soul* hub on Second Life.)

Terms like these are meant for strangers.

the Old Souls* have far more developed tastes and requirements from their sexual and romantic partners and even their friends (even though sexual labels don’t come to make friends, the Cat/Dog division is far more important in making friends for them, too.) They’re always looking for ways to simplify the search process for themselves by using labels and terms to describe who and what they’re looking for. To them, there are far too many people in this world to get to know each and every one of them personally when you can just say what you’re into and then limit your search to those people. They also often find that their immediate circles are TOO SMALL to find like-minded company, so the Internet provides a welcome opportunity to seek connection with like-minded individuals wherever they may roam.

You must understand this: Terms like these are meant for strangers’ use. They have very little practical application among family and friends. They are words used when we introduce ourselves to strangers so they’ll know to quickly put us into an appropriate category and treat us accordingly. If I say I’m a heterosexual, it means I do not wish to be romantically or sexually approached by other women and assume that in a civilized group of people, other women will respect my wish. With my friends, who cares if I’m straight or gay, bi or whatever, it has no relevance among friends.

Partnered people don’t really need these terms that much.

Also, if you’re already romantically attached in a closed relationship, your sexual identity becomes somewhat irrelevant information to strangers. Not always, but for the most part, if you’re happy in your relationship, your sexual dynamics are nobody else’s business.

It still pays to know that a person’s sexual identity affects the way they interact with other people based on their gender. It is something that is within us, whether we like it or not, and that changes the group dynamics and compatibility of different types of people.

Other than that, these labels are a theoretical curiosity that helps scientists and curious people like myself to structure our world and interpersonal interactions. For those who find the labels more of a source of stress and discomfort, I suggest you label yourself the Young Soul*ality and explain it means a person who likes their life simple and somewhat traditional and to get to know the people in their lives personally, and not through a whole bunch of pre-determined labels… And then, please allow the Old Souls* go to town with theirs, as we NEED THEM to communicate efficiently.

Cat or Dog?

Try out my Zen Metal Personality Quest on Second Life. (It’s all free, but you’ll need a free Second Life account and a viewer (like a 3D browser). Check the map and click ‘join Second Life’. Also; there’s an age limit of 16 years and over that I recommend parents respect; Second Life is very open minded, if you know what I’m saying. It may sound like a kid’s thing on the surface but it isn’t.)

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