Ice Breaker for the Survivalist*

The funny thing is, that the more uncertain you are about whether or not you are really the Survivalist* or  not, the more certain it is that you are. However, there are instances when a Idealists* might have picked this group, for instance, if you felt that you never fit anywhere because you know you are a difficult individual, tend not to get on with a lot of people and find yourself struggling to maintain friendships, and you picked this group out of frustration, the chances are that you are actually a Idealists*, and you should probably change groups – all of those things will be cleared in the other group, whereas here you will continue feeling like the odd one out.

the Survivalist* are generally speaking very good at fitting in with new people. They know what is expected of them and they are good entertainers, they love company and light conversation, but they are sometimes feeling stretched beyond their capacities and they may feel like people are demanding too much of them sometimes. They often also feel left alone with problems and ignored by others, particularly family members and colleagues who don’t seem to care about their needs. Although to the Survivalist* things like friends, family, and work colleagues are of great importance and they find nothing as important as their relationships, they find it nearly impossible sometimes to get their family and colleagues to collaborate with the simplest things, whereas it is much easier with their friends, even though the troublesome friend is often the most important one to them. It is almost as though the more they care and try to maintain the relationship the less they collaborate, and that creates a lot of frustration and sadness in the Survivalist*.

Here is the culprit: The Survivalist* are often trying to make the Idealists* do things and participate into things that the Idealists* regards about as fun and entertaining as getting your wisdom teeth pulled out. They still do it because they see no other option, but reluctantly and by dragging their feet. And this is one of the biggest goals on this side of the fence; to learn how to interact with a Idealists*, or how to accept their bizarre way of doing things so that the entire relationship will not break due to the misunderstandings that are ages old between the Survivalist* and the Idealists*. Ironically, on the other side, I will be guiding the Idealists* on how to break their relationships with the Survivalist* and how to avoid getting into them at all – as the Idealists* really truly need to limit their the Survivalist* contacts to a minimum in order to find personal peace and calm. The reason why I am teaching that to the Idealists* is because the vast majority of the Survivalist* that the readers of this blog will encounter during their lives won’t be able to do what I am about to tell you, and therefore the best option, from the Idealists* point of view is to put as much distance to any the Survivalist* and themselves as they can possibly manage.

A Survivalist* is often in the need of a big wake-up call because they often get their way and they are used to getting their way without an objection, apart from when it comes to the Idealists*. Because the Idealists* are freedom fighters, they would never try and force their will on anyone, they get insulted when the Survivalist* tries to use their power of influence on them to make them do something they don’t want to do… Be it an attendance at a barbeque party they don’t want to be at or an order to marry someone they do not love. Essentially, no matter how big or small, the Idealists* feels just about as uncomfortable being told what to do even if they would do the very same thing voluntarily if nobody forced their hand to it.

The Survivalist* side of things will have a lot to do with how to ask a Idealists* for favours, what not to do, how to make them know you love them and what is the absolute no-no if you want to make them feel safe with you. To simplify it: There is no fear in a Idealists* greater than losing their right to make up their own mind for themselves. (Hence the reason the unemployment offices are full of the Idealists*, and the more they are being pushed towards employment, the less likely they are going to go along with that plan – simply as a psychological self-protection system.)

The trouble is, that the Survivalist* feel the need to control everything and everyone around them. You can smile broadly, laugh, and say “I can be a bit of a control freak” like it was this cutesy thing you do. To a Idealists*, it would be akin to laughing at the fact you can be a bit rapey sometimes. (You know… Limiting someone else’s freedom of choice and making them do something for your pleasure that they don’t want to do and then brushing it off as just one of those quirky things you do… I call it “the love rape”, forcing someone into giving you love because you want it, shoving their objection to the side as irrelevant to you.)

I told you this was going to be a bit heavy…

So okay, comparing this to a rape is a bit thick, I get that, but the point is that the Survivalist* really need to learn to hear what the Idealists* tell them, and believe that no means no. The good thing is, that the Survivalist* sometimes get really relieved when someone tells them exactly how things are because they are so sick and tired of people talking in circles, a Idealists* quality that they call politeness. 😉

In many ways this is going to be a reminder that you do not fart rainbows either, and I am going to turn the mirror to you and point out things that the Idealists* would normally ever address in side-sentences, indirectly, or through art and philosophy, because, to them, saying such things out loud to someone they care about is an act of a brute, not fit for a lady or a gentleman… The Idealists* have a very highly developed sense of decorum, and a lot of the art that goes into interacting with a Idealists* is about reading between the lines… And what is between the lines is not always pleasant.

In the following posts, I will walk you through the subcategories to the Survivalist*.

Next Step: Are you the Survivalist* Student?

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