It is enough to some people to just be admired.

There are two types of people in this world, and it seemed to me at first that this too was about the Normal Person* and the Savants*alities but it isn’t. There are people who are happy being admired and loved rather than admire and love. The root cause of this maybe your poly leaning (advanced sexual orientation definition), although again, that is not a direct link. Let me explain.

We are all in one of four categories; a polygynist, polyandrist, polygynandrist, or a monogamist. You may now nod your head and state you’re a monogamist, but that’s actually the LEAST LIKELY category you’ll belong in. True monogamists are… Virtually non-existent… Maybe even truly non-existent, I am not sure; at this stage, I add it to the list as a theoretical possibility that monogamists exist; after all, once they find each other, they don’t really get out that much. They’ve got what they need, and that’s it.

Respect for the opposite gender comes hard for the -gynists and -andrists.

Polyandrists, both male and female polyandrists, have a hard time loving and respecting (other) women as their equals. Therefore, a true polyandrist male in a monogamous relationship will be happy to have his wife worship him while he goes about his business of being awesome. A polyandrist man doesn’t really EXPECT MUCH from a female. He’s happy if she knows how to be A WIFE, a rib bone cut off the chest of a man, basically. A polyandrist man, whom I love with all my heart, considering I’m a polyandrist female, is the chauvinist pig, the thorn on the side of a polygynist woman. The joke is that a polyandrist woman IS the intellectual equal of a polyandrist man and thus has an equal disrespect toward the polygynist woman, whose assets lie elsewhere.

Polygynists, both men, and women, have a hard time loving and admiring (other) men as their equals. Therefore, a polygynist woman is happy to be admired and worshipped by her ‘inferior’ husband because she doesn’t expect much from men in general. She’s happy if she keeps getting the gold and the jewelry acquired by her “materialistic” polyandrist husband, who, by the way, DOES NOT work for gold or jewelry, but for the love of his craft.

Polygynandrists, again, don’t have this problem, but I’ll add them here anyway; they love and respect both men and women equally and can see the virtue in both genders much clearer than the polyandrist and polygynist can. Now, you might think they’re the “better” people, but no. “A preference” is simply that; a preference toward a certain way of life, a certain focus in life. Basically, if polyandrists should choose one over the other, they’d choose work over family, achievement over nurturing, and polygynists would choose family and nurturing children over work; which to them is only a means to an end goal of feeding a family.

To a polyandrist “male thinker,” the intellectual pursuit of work is more important than providing for the family – even though many of them feel it’s certainly a good thing those two things go hand-in-hand. Polygynandrists may feel the same way, but at this stage of evolution, it is likely that they are of the median of IQ (and ambition), which means their intellectual needs are met in tasks that don’t require a high IQ… Like polyandrists, male thinkers do. (Not that they couldn’t evolve toward that, but that probably won’t change their soulmate connections down the line. So the rare female who is intellectually driven, challenge-driven at least, might develop bonds with men far before other women do, then they continue with those links and continue being polyandrists while other people catch up in the reincarnation timeline.)

Natural polygamists live in artificially monogamous societies.

Anyway, as we live in monogamist societies, by and large, people cannot practice their authentic polygamous leaning, but that doesn’t change their true nature. They still admire the same things they’d admire if they could, and for the polyandrist, they figure only a handful of women meet their standards for “a good guy,” and for the polygynist, it means only a handful of men would qualify, in their eyes, as a nice enough guy to be accepted as ‘one of the girls.’

We are only now entering the time of female achievement and personal pride, which may alter these bonds down the line, but there are those few women who have never cared much about the rules and have rather followed men wherever men go and given no mind to the female way of living. These women are polyandrists, and they’ve had lifetimes to create deep bonds with men.

Value systems are different.

Therefore, as the polyandrist and polygynist value system is very different; intelligence and achievement vs. nurturing and caring, they don’t TRULY admire the other gender by default, and they don’t EXPECT that much from them. So, to them, it is NATURAL that they are the one being admired for their abilities, while the spouse does their admiring, and in many ways, polyandrist and polygynist females have learned to admire the qualities of their other half as a compromise and a learned behavior rather than an authentic one. Rather like: “Well, you aren’t breathtaking, but I do have to give you credit for this ability…” BOTH OF THEM feel like the other is the one doing the admiring, while they only give them “a few points” for being what they are. Therefore, feeling like a little bit of a liar when they admire their spouse, they both shower them with extreme praise just to cover up their lack of true admiration toward them.

As always, polygynists and polyandrists are much the same genders reverse, and whenever one is guilty of one thing, the other is guilty of the same or similar in genders reversed situation. This is kind of funny because both types accuse the other of all kinds of immorality, but when you turn the tables, we’re just as guilty but in reverse. And the way to fix it is to say: “You know what, you got me, guilty as charged; now I’m going to go and be polygynist/polyandrist.” (As if a polygynist would ever admit to having been wrong. 😉 )¹

1. Polyandrist jibe in jest, mind you. ↩

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