LOA and stuff that matters too much to ask for it

There is a psychological kink that a lot of us have in the way that we value things around us. In all reality, everything is of equal value. There is no reason why one thing should be more difficult to get than other, be it food, money, fame, love, books, furniture, bed linen… Everything under the Sun is of equal value to the… Enabler or Provider… I think I should come up with a new term for God… How does The Great Enabler sound? Anyway – in our mind, we value things differently. I noticed this once at a supermarket, where I was first looking at some Barbie fashions – I am a collector – and talked myself out of buying a new fashion, just telling myself that it was “too expensive” and I couldn’t have it. Then, I walked up to the greeting cards, as my friend had a birthday coming up and I needed to find her a greeting card. Without thinking much of the price or the importance of having a card that played music, I bought the card without so much as a second thought… And when I checked the price, it was almost exactly the price as the Barbie fashion would have been… And as fancy as that card was, was it really worth the same as the doll fashion to my friend or to me? Hardly. There was nothing “too expensive” about the card, because it was just a card. It didn’t mean anything to me. This is the kink. I wanted that fashion, so although the price tag was around 7 dollars or so, in my mind it was probably around $35 or so. The card that meant nothing to me, had a similar price tag (it was blinking expensive card), but since it didn’t mean anything, in my mind it had a price tag of about $2, and in addition it was for someone else, so that always makes things cheaper in my mind.

Have you ever noticed how difficult it is to ask for something that you really, really want? We feel guilty for even wanting it. (See “How guilt screws up your love life” for relationship example of the same thing.) If you’d really love some help around the house, the last thing you do is to ask for it. If you don’t really think it’s such a big of a deal, you’ll be much more likely to shout out: “Could you give me a hand here?” and not get all wrapped up in guilt for asking something so massive for yourself. When you really want someone to be your friend, sending them a Facebook friend request seems like a freaking proposal of marriage, but you shoot a friend request to someone you don’t really care about without a second thought.

We all need to work up the nerve to want the things we truly want for ourselves and not feel guilty for wanting it. Second step is to admit to yourself that you want it and then saying it out loud… To those of us who are still struggling with those things, telling a True Mirror that you’d like to go out with them some day… Holy cow, right?

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