Polyamorous tendencies are inborn. Are you poly?

You might not have been aware that you are, in fact, polyamorous by nature. You might have noticed something before. Regardless, like many others, you are so used to the monogamous expectation that you haven’t really thought it through. You may think it is normal that your relationships are a bit of a drag at times. Getting bored with monogamy doesn’t mean at all that you’re incapable of love, however. Quite the opposite. Polyamory isn’t about counting quotas.

Some signs you might be polyamorous

Although these depend on your natural alignment (as not all polys are alike), there are some signs:

• You are sexually aroused by some form of group play. Depending on the participants’ gender, you can tell something about your natural alignment.
• You may strongly prefer the company of your own gender people. (No, this is not a given!)
• You may strongly prefer the company of the opposite gender people, and despair those times you HAVE to hang out with the members of your own gender.
• You find crowds sexy and full of potential.

Signs of actual monogamy

• You prefer to stick with one person at all times. You find it difficult and irritating to shift attention between people, even during several day intervals. (Polys do focus on one person at a time, too.)
• You find it an exciting to never be with another person sexually, or you’re not even thinking about it.

Different ways to be polyamorous

Your natural way of being polyamorous depends on a few factors. One of them is that you might have never met the right people, but then again, we know to reject the wrong type of a relationship with a swift “NO WAY!” Note also that polyamory doesn’t automatically assume bisexuality, although many bisexuals are also naturally polyamorous.

Polyandry – Best male friends share a woman they both/all truly love and respect (and fancy). (Polygynous men feel disempowered and “like wallpaper” in this scenario. A polygynous woman would feel like a sexually abused outsider in this scenario.)
Polygyny – Best girlfriends share a man they both/all truly love and respect (and fancy). (Polyandrous men feel lonely and losing out in this scenario. Polyandrous women would feel exhausted or like wallpaper in this scenario – getting sex is too difficult.)
Polygynandry (standard form) – Best friends of both genders share each other in love and respect. (Polygynous and polyandrous people feel unchallenged in this scenario, too easy, lacks grit.)

To not make things simple, there are people who are firstly monogamous but enjoy a polyamorous play, but then there are also poly-committed people who still enjoy some form of “swinging”.

The ways your natural alignment affects your relationships can be surprising

Women who are naturally polygynous will find it natural that the man they are in love with tends to have a wandering eye. Naturally polyandrous women, however, will find it surprisingly easy to find a faithful man. Polyandrous men, in return, seem to all get fixated on one and the same woman. Polygynous men, in their turn, figure their wandering eye is about “being a guy” and put their polygynous tendencies down to being a man.

Whenever we try and push ourselves into a mode that isn’t natural, like monogamy, in this case, we’ll run into problems. Nobody is good in a relationship not right for them.

Polyamorous people are really bad at falling OUT OF LOVE with their partners

Polyamory has a bad rep for being for people who get bored easily. That is not really true though. More to the point, the polyamorous people find it difficult to actually fall out of love with people. They may be very good at letting go, but not really turning the emotions off. They are quite used to feeling love for people they are not in a relationship with because their natural alignment is designed to love many people permanently.

We also feel attraction to the very right people by instinct. Although you would all live a monogamous lifestyle, you are still polyamorous. Your natural partners are automatically aligned the same way as you are. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t be your natural partners.

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