Home

Messages from Sebastyne as chosen by the Universe.

 

 

Random image

She’s calm – does it mean she’s also cold or unaffected by you?

One sign of an experienced, old soul, is calmness. This goes for both men and women, it’s just really difficult to get all upset over something you know is temporary or not life-threatening. One thing old souls usually don’t get overly nervous over is feeling love or sexual arousal. Old souls know what’s happening to them – even as teens – and don’t get upset about it. When they get pregnant, they wing it with the same calmness as everything else. This doesn’t mean they’re not emotional or feeling love or, indeed, arousal.

Calm also allows people to be more observant, in the present, and aware of another person’s emotional state. When calm, a person is in a state of awareness and alertness, taking in more information than letting out – it’s a power position. If you think of a silverback gorilla, they are rarely overly aggressive or nervous, they are the chillest guy in the band. They reached their position KNOWING what’s going on around them, reacting appropriately in correct measure. Calmness is a sign of maturity rather than coldness, however, one of the benefits of calm is that enemies have a harder time reading you.

How to approach a calm woman?

Eye contact is always the best first step. You ask for permission to approach by looking a girl in the eye. If she’s cold or doesn’t want you to approach, she’ll look away. Don’t expect her to stare into your eyes, tho, as staring is some form of aggression, if any staring is going on, there cannot be long maintained eye contact at the end of it, as that would be weird and aggressive.

When you look her in the eye, she’ll accept your approach by keeping her eyes locked for a moment, before looking away to not act weird. She’ll look at you seeking eye contact soon if you don’t react straight away. The problem that arises here is that both males and females of our species can be alpha. Two alphas are SUPPOSED TO mate, but that means one of them assumes the role of an alpha… Whether he or she likes it or not. (It may be some kind of alpha to you here, subbing you there -mash-up, but let’s talk about that elsewhere.) But when two alphas try to make this connection, they both expect to be approached. Both of them are used to being approached, but they’re unfamiliar with the act of submission – walking up to the person they’re interested in… Physically closing that distance.

An alpha female, by the way, won’t ORDER you to mate her, by the way. That is the tactic of a beta, who knows she has very little chance of success lest she puts pressure on you to pay attention to her. This means you have to meet an alpha half-way, even if you’re a beta.

How to be different to an Alpha?

Alpha females, calm women, get approached a lot. They get propositioned a lot. Tons of love confessions, gushing, gifts in some cases, offers of all kinds. What would make a man different is usually as simple as a high IQ. The ability to have an intelligent, flowing conversation over almost any topic thrown in. Betas cannot have an intelligent conversation. They forget details she’s  already told them. They lack in general knowledge and the ability to pick up and remember new information fast. They confuse details and make bad connections between a supposed cause and effect.

An alpha male will do the opposite, and this can’t be faked. If you CAN do this, you’re either a potential alpha or you already are one. An alpha male enjoys an intelligent conversation, and he also likes intelligent women. (Perhaps he’s not used to them, however.) An alpha male remembers things she’s already told him to startling accuracy. Nothing is as offputting to an Alpha than having to retell something she’s already told him just moments before. This doesn’t seem like disinterest to her, but a simple lack of brain capacity… She knows he’s trying. An alpha male has a great sense of humor and he’s witty – or smartly sarcastic and he points out laughable, ridiculous, or downright hilarious things he’s observing. This keeps an Alpha female interested.

From here, it’s just a matter of finding the mutually interesting topics to talk about, but that shouldn’t be too hard. While politics, science, and say, chess are not forbidden topics, refrain from intellectual show-offiness. You’re still supposed to entertain and be pleasant to talk to, therefore entertain by offering intelligent information and refrain from testing her intelligence by assuming she knows stuff like names of chess moves or the periodic tables. You can show your enthusiasm for those things, and she’ll probably love listening to you talk about it – and pick up knowledge fast, too, but don’t try to embarrass her by showing you that you are SMARTER or more knowledgeable than she is – that wouldn’t be a smart move if you want her to like you. Trying to one-up and dominate in intelligence or intellectualism actually has the opposite effect to the desired; she’ll see you as insecure and thus overly domineering. Not silverback material. Silverbacks don’t get nervous and insecure. They are charming, calming, and reassuring.

Note that even a smart man can forget over lifetimes of bullshit, so to speak, that intelligent women exist and how things work with them. Alphas are approached constantly, chased down the aisle and often successfully, and in the expectation of monogamy, you forget alpha females exist. They have a similar problem with when it comes to men.

Subscribe to get a Daily Message

Enter your email to get a daily message picked by the Universe delivered to your email.