Support, not override your instinct with the following

Many times in life, we feel like the right action to take is… whatever it is, right? However, we get conflicting advice one pointing to that direction, the other pointing there. Now, the problem is, that different people ASSUME that EVERYONE wants an outcome THEY feel is the obvious desired outcome. They may advise you toward the outcome they think you’re after, when in fact, you want something different entirely, or even by a nuance.

I’m here to guide you toward knowing WHAT people mean when they advise you to do this, that, or the other, and to reassure you that the outcome you want is more than likely behind the instinctive action you wish to take.

What is instinct?

An instinct is our knowledge of what will happen if we do a certain action. This knowledge is a result of observing a role model, following other people’s deliberate guidance, experience following whatever motivated you to try it the last time and learning from previous lifetimes through experimentation. For instance, you may have had excellent, instinctive, and aware, well life-experienced parents who chose the most wonderful spouse for you in a previous lifetime, and you learned your parents will ALWAYS know better… But in this lifetime, you weren’t that lucky with your parents… And now your instincts are confused when you follow your parent’s lead and wind up in a hole.

I don’t want you to override your instincts by what I, or anyone else, teaches you. I don’t want you to act out of blind faith to what I say, as BLINDNESS is the last thing I want to cause in you. Instead, I want to awaken you, make you stop when you are afraid, and rather than rush on encouraged by fools’ bravery, I want you to respect your fear as a sign of not knowing what the fuck you’re actually about to do. I want you to be doubtful, obstinate, and argumentative… Just that, I won’t be here to listen to you argue. You can do it in your own privacy, thank you very much. 🙂

I want you to stop seeing fear as something to ignore. I want you to NEVER act out of fear again, but to learn to take time and find the pleasurable option (or the least of several evils available).

Be guided by your enjoyment and pleasure

There is a reason why we are so ready to take advice that leads to misery and self-sacrifice. That reason is very much psychological, but interestingly enough leads us astray. Different people want different things. In addition, we are all hard-wired to trying to make each other happy (believe it or not). We do this, while we are still unaware of how different we all are, and therefore, we may force a solution that worked for us, down the necks of other people who simply don’t want the outcome that was like heaven’s opening for us. Your abusive parents were simply not aware that the lesson that meant the world to them is nothing of the sort to you.

I want you to realign yourself to seek a pleasurable, enjoyable route. But to find it with intelligence and maturity. Finding the balance in following a philosophy, your instincts, and your knowledge. To be more aware of what motivates you, and making your choices with more self-respect and self-love. I sometimes describe my theory as moral selfishness, but I digress.

The younger you are, the better – youth is wasted on the young is the truest statement ever written. I hope to make it untrue. I hope we’ll all ace our next lifetime from the ground up!

If you can’t do that, choose options you hate the least

If you feel too insecure to say you’d LOVE something, then, choose options you feel you hate the least at this point in time. Try things. I’ll give you all the options that I can think of, and there’s no need to swear you’ll love something if you simply don’t know if you will. Try it. There are things you will instantly say “no, I don’t want to, don’t make me…” and nobody’s going to make you do ANYTHING. That’s the entire POINT of Free Spirit Theories. You get to choose. But then, there are things you might want to try, but you don’t want to sign your life up to it and say “this is who I am and going to always be.” That’s fine. Curiosity is fine. TRYING things is fine.

What is NOT FINE is forcing another person to make those decisions for you, and then making them responsible for the things they chose for you. If you don’t know, what chances do they have? All you’d be doing there is to make them feel responsible when you can’t make a decision for yourself.

So. It is OK to say “I don’t know but I’d like to try”. “I am curious.” You know you don’t have to even know if you’re bi or straight or whatever, “bi-curious” is an actual thing, you know? The idea here is to get to know who you are, some people already know, and they HATE IT when people try to force them into “trying things” that they’ve already tried a million times and know they don’t like it. That’s why I refuse to give you whip and crop to say “this is the right way of being” when quite honestly, there are 7 billion right ways of being a human. YOU WILL HAVE TO figure this out for yourself, but you CAN choose the option that looks the least hateful and displeasing from the get-go. Just be honest. “I don’t know if I like this or that option. I’m willing to give it a go, or say, maybe I’ll change my mind later, but as it looks to me now, NOTHING IN THIS WORLD would make me want to try THAT!” It’s just as good.

There is no need to make a commitment before you’re ready to make a commitment.

If buts and maybes

Everything in life is a mixture of different options and nuances that work for some people and don’t work for all. Each steadfast rule has a situation where it no longer applies. Therefore, I’m trying to teach you to switch your action based on the unique situation, find the balance point in everything and find the best way forward – not relying on one single life lesson… except maybe this: Avoid acting when afraid or depressed. These are HORRIBLE times to make decisions, and these are the times most decisions are made. There may be times when you have to, in order to save your life, but if it’s not a matter of life and death, acting when afraid or depressed is rarely wise. It is the right thing to do only when the fear feels pleasurable, tingly, and exciting.

The point being… When you are uncertain, stop, ponder. Slow down, at least. A road isn’t straight. A course you take when you take to a road is not going to be the right direction by the time you get there. Learn to use the fucking steering wheel, rather than brave your direct course on a windy road…

And mind the fact that sometimes the visibility is near zero, and if you then have to stop until the fog clears, it is not smart by anyone’s standard to hit the gas and hope for the best instead.

Stop being brave. Start being smart.

And remember. There’s nothing wrong in its right place, and there’s nothing right in its wrong place. If you want to do “wrong” find the right place for it. If you think you are doing the right thing, maybe it’s the wrong place… Person for it?

Now, let’s dissect some people psyche.

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