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Messages from Sebastyne as chosen by the Universe.

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When did it happen?

I’m going to avoid headlines in this post because I don’t want anyone looking over your shoulder to see what you’re reading. Now. If you’re somewhere public or in the view of other people as you see this post, go somewhere else to read it. Somewhere where nobody can see you. This may get rough. […]

The child’s trust in a narcissistic ex spouse.

A narcissist is a child in an adult body. They are not evil any more than a child is evil when scared or fighting to survive on their own in the big, bad world. It is difficult for an adult in an adult body to understand what they are so afraid of, but one of […]

How do you know you’re truly in love.

If you haven’t experienced this, you’ll think I’ve gone crazy. I would have said the same not that long ago. You know you’re in love (even platonically) when you feel that stuff you’d normally never do to a partner or a friend is somewhat funny. Things that are downright abusive now just feel sexy or […]

Phrase it this way: “I don’t like that image of me being portrayed to the outside world.”

If you have to deal with a narcissist who keeps representing you incorrectly as a favor to you, they may lie about you in public. You may have tried to tell them that you don’t like it, because “that’s not who you are.” To a narcissist, who you are means nothing. It’s nobody’s business who […]

Sometimes, Idealists* are terrified of rejection, utterly romantic, and very keen to form a relationship…

Idealists*, men especially, often display the Avoidant Attachment Style, or disorder as it’s sometimes named. This is a reaction to the way people react to them, sometimes their parents and even a person with a Secure Attachment Style may show symptoms of the Avoidant Attachment Style. These are terms from the Attachment Theory, which […]

It is tough for any healthy person to consider themselves the man or woman of someone else’s dreams.

When you fall in love with someone, you may think your best way forward is to make sure your loved one knows exactly how much you adore them. How big your feelings are. However, when you hear that told you, you kinda feel… “Oh, they must be high,” or, more to the actual point: “Oh […]

I’d much rather be encouraging.

I wish I could get out of this mode of writing. It seems that no matter what, another annoying topic pops up and I have to address it. I’d much rather write encouraging, loving posts, telling people everything is fine and you’re all loved and cared for, but the truth is… I’d be lying to […]

The meaning of a job isn’t what you do in the 8 hours, it’s what you do with the pay check.

Take it from someone who has been philosophically opposed to getting “a meaningless job” for my entire life. (I’m nearly 49 now; this is how long it took me to overcome this particular philosophical handicap.) The meaning of a job is not in the work itself; it doesn’t matter what you do. The meaning is […]

Why do you love your True Emotion Mirror more than you love your child?

There is some expectation in some people that they get to act like children with their True Emotion Mirrors (and non-related Precious Soulmates) because True Emotion Mirrors should love them more than their child. The reason why your True Emotion Mirror loves you more than they love their child is LARGELY BECAUSE THEY DON’T ACT […]

Let’s not normalize narcissism in women.

No, wait, we already have. Let’s denormalize narcissism in women. List of narcissistic traits: (From ChatGPT) Grandiosity – Having an inflated sense of self-importance, feeling superior to others. Preoccupation with success – Constantly thinking about achievements, power, or beauty. Need for admiration – Seeking excessive attention and validation from others. Sense of entitlement – Expecting […]

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