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Messages from Sebastyne as chosen by the Universe.

How to become good at sex?

Stop pretending to be too good for the sex you want. You’re a horny animal. Accept it. Live with it. BE it. Stop lying to yourself and your partners. Stop hiding behind your “knowledge” of sex. It’s not a fucking school exam. It’s an act between HUMANS. Animals. A human female, a human male… And […]

How much to tell your kids about sex and romance?

Dog Type Thinking children need to know the practicalities of sexual relationships. They want to know how they’re conducted, how to get into one, and what is expected of them in a relationship like that. Please teach them to respect other people’s relationship needs by not pursuing relationships with people whose needs they cannot understand. […]

Can sex be your primary connection and it still be a True Emotion Mirror connection?

Yes, it can, and it kinda has to be. It, too, must be mutual, however, even if you have a mutual fetish for “forced” scenarios. But it cannot be your ONLY connection. Our sexuality is the thing that brings people together into a sexual relationship. A romantic/sexual relationship without sex is called a friendship, not […]

If you want a relationship not based on sex, don’t use sex to get it.

Enough said.

You shouldn’t think you’re less of a friend if you ALSO have sex.

There are some people who see sexual relationships as “less than” other friendships. To me, however, and I know to a lot of people, the sexual relationship is like Friendship+. Where every other relationship is limited to what is non-sexual, a sexual relationship has no expansion limits. You can be the best of friends AND […]

People who believe nice (and sex) is reserved for friends (and spouse-material) only, think you’re evil if you’re nice with more people.

Just saying. Some people believe you being nice and non-calculative is evil.

How much awareness of your sexuality is fun, and how much of it just spoils the surprise?

There is the problem of consent. It’s all playing it quite safe, even too safe. We should aim for a society that accepts a wound or two in grown-up people rather than trying to molly-coddle everyone into a ball of cotton wool for safe protection at all times. We kinda like things rough at times, […]

Love tourism – the third of a couple – sexual attraction to momentary love.

Today, I discovered there’s another type of sexuality that I’ve been only semi-aware of. It’s called symbiosexuality. It means that you’re sexually attracted to a pre-existing couple and their ‘synergy.’ Me as a cynic, I sometimes find a little ‘mocky’ explanations to be quite effective; it seems like a type of love tourism; you are […]

Flirtation without expectations is very sexy – unfortunately usually targeted at people we’re not that into.

Here’s another one of life’s big mysteries solved. Why do you attract people who you’re not that interested in? I shall tell you: Being nice to someone you’re not really interested is much easier than to be nice to someone you admire and want to like you more. Me, for example, my flirt game with […]

Why would someone that sexy talk to me if they weren’t interested in me?

Looking good is not an accident. It is a result of respect shown first to oneself, then to others. It is a CONSCIOUS effort people put into in order to be datable by other good-looking people – why else would anybody bother? The fact that someone cares enough to keep themselves looking their best means […]

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