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Messages from Sebastyne as chosen by the Universe.

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What are reasonable expectations in a relationship? How much attention? Sex? Together-time?

The purpose of a relationship is to make you feel loved, wanted, cared for, happy, and fulfilled. If those things are not there, the relationship does not fulfill its purpose. What is reasonable is not the question. The question is: is what you are getting enough for you? Another question may be: Is what you […]

Breaking an unwanted soulmate bond – the Savants* leaving the Normal Person*

If you’re a Savants*, and the person you’re leaving or asking to leave is the Normal Person*, you’ll have to understand one fundamental difference in your thinking. The Normal Person* always aim to preserve every relationship and make them deeper, but very much on their own terms. The Savants* want to ensure our […]

Why playing “a role” in a relationship is bad?

There are people who like to pretend to be someone who is not in a relationship with other people. This is unlikely intended as a form of deception, but that’s how it’s often received. It might not make sense to a person what “just be yourself” means or why it’s bad that they’re not that […]

How to end a relationship with the Normal Person*: “I don’t need you anymore, you’re free to go.”

MANY the Savants* and Dog-Type relationships are based on the illusion that the other needs you. Quite possibly, you are both in it thinking the other one needs you for something—emotional support, financial stability, or to teach them to do something for them. However, the truth may be the opposite: You may be a […]

To get true love you have to learn how to be charming.

There are people who confuse unconditional love with true love. Unconditional love, however, is reserved for infant babies. Children over 6 years old are learning fast how to be charming – how to be nice and fun to be with. A baby is given unconditional love because that’s the key to their survival. Adults, however, […]

The True Emotion Mirror conflict – how all of your relationship values can turn on their head.

Meeting your True Emotion Mirror can make you feel things you never thought you would. Ownership, jealousy, anger on top of all that love that you never associated being linked to love. You know other people feel those things for people whom they should never even consider theirs, and you may feel shocked at your […]

Signs of a relationship that is simply NOT going to work.

Some of these seem like an obvious thing but trust me; they aren’t to all people. In ALL relationships, including sexual and romantic: Significantly different IQ levels; 30 points difference, experts say, makes communication practically impossible. (Your “problems” nor your “joys” will ever seem valid or real to the other.) Same said differently: You can’t […]

Real or Fantasy – True Love at First Sight or just a foolish crush?

Here’s the interesting thing: I trust people to fall in love at first sight MORE than I trust them falling in love with someone nice they’ve gotten to know a bit. The reason is this: Your instinct can lead you to the right one; your soul recognizes its’ true lover (even if there’s a few […]

Polygynandry as the ideal default relationship form – even for teens.

I find it absolutely insane that we expect our teenagers to form loyalty to someone who will eventually turn out to be a temporary love interest down the line. Faithfulness is not a skill you learn in adolescence; it should be a natural reaction to your natural partner, not something that needs enforcing. If someone […]

Not every relationship is worth the effort.

There are a lot of people who think every relationship must be preserved at all costs. I’m not one of those people. To me, a relationship needs to give you something; it must be a positive in your life, not just something you must constantly push time and energy and “work” into to keep it […]

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