the Idealists*; Be nice to yourself first.

There are plenty of people who try to do the right thing by you and f*** it up every single time. They TRY and fail, and they won’t learn, even if they try their hardest. You have EVERY RIGHT to stop people like this from ruining your existence. Be certain to look after yourself, because, frankly, nobody else can really do it with the level of certainty that you can.

For instance, being pushed to friendships and relationships that you don’t really want (because he or she is a nice boy/girl) is done with the best of intent. They THINK that’s who and what you’d want. You MUST say no to what you don’t want, even if you don’t know what’s the good thing that they foresee.

Don’t be friends with people whose company you don’t really like that much, even if it means that all of your friends are online. Also, start looking at wealth in another light: you may feel like you don’t really need money to impress other people, and you certainly don’t need it for that. Still, you may need it to relocate yourself to another country when you find the love you seek on another continent. Ferret money away just so that when you need it, you’ve got it. Nobody else needs to know it exists. (the Survivalist* will find a way to make you give it away if you’re not spending it on them already and they’ll think you’d love an opportunity to show them how much you love them. This may also happen through the law of attraction – so unless you love them truly, keep your money.)

I don’t mean you should NOT care for others, but care when you care. Don’t make it into a challenge to care. Especially in this day and age when everything is about donate, donate, donate, care, care, care… Care if you do, donate if you can, and carry no guilt with you about the times when you didn’t care or couldn’t donate.

Am I making the world more callous? No. I’m making it more honest.

The point here being; currently, everybody is sacrificing themselves for other people. Those people who want you to sacrifice yourself for them don’t deserve the sacrifice, and the people who deserve the sacrifice either don’t want you to or need you to (with the sole exception of the possible invasion of your country, but hopefully, all Mister Poopypants of the future will get the attention they so sorely need so they don’t need to throw their tantrums with freaking missiles at hand). Then, there are people who TRY to do the right thing by you, but you wind up self-sacrificing because that’s what you think they want you to do – even if they didn’t – so you have to tell them what you actually want, and stand up for your own best.

If everybody did this, everybody would have one person squarely on their own side, not to DEMAND the right things, but to say NO to the wrong things. Sure, there’s the danger that for a while, everyone will go a time when they have nothing, when everything offered are the things that are on the “no” list, but it will change. No more self-sacrificing, OK? It makes you one less person others need to worry about. Do the right thing by others and watch out for your own best for yourself… And tell others to do the same.

You have every right to say no to things, deny yourself from other people (they’ll fucking survive), and stop putting effort and attention to things you don’t want for yourself.

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