the Savants* or the Normal Person* – sense of self

The main difference between a Savants* and the Normal Person* is how they came to the definition of their own self; their ego. What do they believe they are. I have a somewhat outlandish theory as to how the Normal Person* became the way they are; I believe they are reincarnations of slaves, servants, nuns, monks, or, even, dogs or other domestic animals. I believe that their sense of self has been defined by other people for so long, they no longer know who they are authentically, as a “wild beast”; a real human being. I believe they have lost the connection between a feeling and an action, and they believe the action alone defines who you are: “I marry a member of the opposite sex, therefore, I am a heterosexual”, rather than “I am a heterosexual, therefore I wish to marry a member of the opposite gender.”

However, the root of the action can be difficult to find. The Normal Person* tend to have this idea, that they are “told” to be something specific. Someone is “commanding them” to act in a certain way. Along the lines: I am a woman. Therefore, I am a servant to other’s needs. There are superior women to me. My job is to have children, raise children, and try not to fuss when my husband wants sex.

This is such a deeply ingrained message, that we don’t realize that the message goes in with such a simple message as a child: “You’re a girl.” The parent doesn’t HAVE TO give the child any further instruction if “you’re a girl” means, to her, that her fate is sealed by other people and she has no say in anything regarding her future… or much of the present. If, further, that girl believes she has to be married off to someone if she’s beautiful enough, and if her mother and father fail to fuss over her beauty and future husbands, she may feel utterly worthless, when you believe your only worth is your body in marriage.

We, people, or animals, for that matter, are not born as a blank slate. We carry with us our previous lifetimes, the good, and the bad about them. Some of us are lucky only in that we’ve avoided servitude, we’ve protected our egos, and that’s who I call the Savants*. People who have a clear sense of self; “I am what I enjoy being/doing, and I have every right to enjoy those things.”

I am not entirely sure what made the now the Normal Person* lose their sense of self, and why the Savants* have avoided that fate. Was it that others’ self-love wasn’t enough to protect them from oppression? Were they afraid to try and survive in the wild or risk death for disobedience? Is the only difference a priority issue? To risk my life or my freedom?

I remember around the age of 13, my mother visited the mother of the boy I had the biggest crush on. She wasn’t a frequent visitor, and this was the only time I’d been to his house, which is why this has stuck in my memory all this time. We were walking my dog when we were invited over, so I was sitting there, with my dog in the leash sitting between my legs, not making a fuss. My crush’s father lamented, how dogs are wild beasts and “you have to take their spirit out of them to make them obey.” I remember how my anger flared. “One day that piece of shit of a man will be my father-in-law”, I thought. Self-confidence, right? But the point being, my anarchist heart flared with anger. I could have killed him on the spot for that remark had that been legal.

We all have oppressed feelings and actions. I didn’t kill my prospective father-in-law like he damned well deserved. I didn’t even say a word, but I also didn’t indulge him with an agreement, that’s for sure. Had he continued that line of “wisdom sharing”, I would have likely said something, but luckily for everyone, he shut his stupid ass mouth before more crap came out of it. He’d do wisely to oppress that in the future. He would probably constipate to death. XD

The Normal Person* seems to feel that they either oppress or be oppressed. Some have a clear idea of which role they prefer playing. The oppressed may feel that they want someone to boss them around because they feel that obedience brings them love and acceptance. The oppressors feel that there is no love to be gained, but there are freedom and power to be gained, and that’s something. Therefore, in their loveless life, they opt to oppress and command, while the oppressed still believe the quickest route to love is submission.

However, the submission should be the reaction to love, rather than the tool to gain love. Therefore, I believe that the need to oppress and command others to obedience comes from the fact that once we’re in love, we do submit to our lover’s wishes and needs, we do want to be more like them and we do merge into them. Therefore, I see the Normal Person* as people who have either experienced this euphoric state in their previous life and wish to recreate it by force, or they’ve observed happy couples and thought the way to be loved is to oppress and command, when in fact, love makes slaves of us all, quite without force. True love says: “I am your slave and therefore I command thee. I am your commander, and I command you to do the actions that give you pleasure.” With the Normal Person*, there is only one person who potentially gets pleasure, but even at the best of times, that pleasure is shallow and goes without return.

We must heal the Normal Person*, but first, we must protect ourselves from them, and to free ourselves from their tyranny. They’ll fear this, for they have no trust in the goodness or honor of a fellow human being… But we’ll just have to… Deal with that particular problem.

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