the Survivalist* are drawn to the competence of old souls – the Idealists*.

the Survivalist* are basically younger souls who granted, annoy the living daylights out of the old souls – the Idealists*. What the Survivalist* are typically after is guidance, life lessons, and hand-holding. We tend to be a little too interested in our sex lives to give them much attention, so they’ve learned that to gain Cat Type Thinking* attention requires sex. THAT is really bad for both parties, however. It’s like demanding a teenager for blowjobs for a math lesson. The Survivalist* will MARRY YOU are expecting to be coached on how to be a real wife or husband… Or to coach you when you have no interest in fitting into someone’s stereotypical idea of one.

the Survivalist* NEED stereotypes to model themselves against. Acceptable minimums. Achievable minimums. That said, the Idealists* need none of it. The Idealists* need all of the expectations of age limits and stereotypical thinking, all of that go. So they try to break the rules and stereotypes that are left governing them so they can live free as the very instinctive, competent people that they are. And in doing so, they’re leaving the Survivalist* in a grumbling world they don’t fully understand.

the Idealists* SHOULD NOT agree to sexual relations, marriage included, with the Survivalist*, but if they have CARE left, use it.

the Survivalist* will always try to bargain lessons and care for sex. Don’t get into that. Teach them better. Wherever you are, consider yourself a teacher.

This is the way to tell the difference between “should go there” and “shouldn’t go there.” If you are intrigued by the person’s mind, the way they carry themselves, and who they are/might be, it’s safe to go there. If not, if you feel “blah, same old, same old,” there’s too much of an “age cap.” Do not try to talk yourself into relationships that seem lackluster to you – FOR THEIR GOOD, as well as your own.

Try to navigate the situation with the assumption they want something from you that they are not saying. They’re using sex to get it, but if you ask them what they really want… Maybe ask what they think you want from them and why. Maybe they’ll tell. The likelihood is that they’ll at least leave you alone and find a YouTube channel.

Sex for money, we understand. Sex for education is another thing. Even more likely, sex for care and comfort.

That’s probably why sex is both present everywhere and removed from everywhere. It’s about this difference.

the Survivalist* don’t want to have sex, typically. They’d prefer to live an asexual life, but they will accept anything that is “for their own good.” Therefore, if they’re told “orgasms are healthy,” they’ll try to have them like brushing teeth. Obviously, there’ll be a point when it clicks in, but they’ll have sex prematurely as a matter of course, assuming they have to. The Idealists* assume they want to. Typically, they don’t. The Survivalist* are often identifiable simply by the way they look: nothing you’d want to sleep with in a fit. This isn’t true for the Survivalist* who believe sex is the best way to get care, love, guidance, and security.

Therefore, the Survivalist* want to sterilize everything, to remove sex from everything, and the Idealists* try to educate, liberate, and to advocate whatever sexual preferences they may have – to break free from Lover-thinking* censorship. The more one type wants something the more another pushes it in there…. With concessions.

Divide everything  into two: Sexual version and the non-sexual version… And the sex-ed version.

the Survivalist* don’t typically want to involve themselves in sexual things. Give them that option. Let the choice be there, and offer guidance when appropriate but allow adults to choose, perhaps with a good qualifying questionnaire to the effect of ARE YOU SURE you want this?

You could also apply this to your personal life and start asking new potential dates a question: “If you could be my friend or my sex partner, which would you actually prefer? We can be either,” If you can’t figure which type they are.” (the Idealists* would probably answer “both,” if they’re actually interested in you.)

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