The Key to Healing The Entire World

I am about to suggest an attitude sift. If everyone in this world would make sure that ONE PERSON is not getting bullied into a state of unhappiness by well-meaning people surrounding them, or that this same ONE PERSON is taking the necessary steps to become happy, this world would be healed within say, 10-20 years. There is ONE PERSON in this world who has all the incentive in this world to make you happy. There is ONE PERSON who you cannot live without or get rid of: YOU. You will always have to live with yourself, and you will ALWAYS be the one who suffers for all of your bad choices. Therefore, each and every person should make sure they are OK.

I am not suggesting to NOT CARE about others

I am not at all suggesting that you should not care about other people. We DO care about other people. We’re hard-wired to. That sometimes causes unnecessary drama. We LOVE other people, and we should. BUT.

What I am saying is that PLEASE, make it EASIER for others to ensure your happiness by making sure you don’t allow them to make you UNHAPPY. Don’t SUBMIT to the pretense that someone has made you happy or satisfied just so they could feel accomplished. Don’t sacrifice your own happiness for anyone – if they are nice people, they don’t want you to, and if they are bad people, they don’t deserve the sacrifice. (LIKE WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND would say: “I love you, therefore, I want to make you unhappy so I know you love me, too.” There ARE people who think that way but MY GOD they should get a big fat wakeup call.)

Others can make each other unhappy completely without intending to. It may even SEEM deliberate, as people’s idea of what happiness is is so different. Every person perceives happiness differently. Therefore, it’s really difficult to guess what it is that others need in order to be happy – especially as a lot of us project a lot. (This means, that we assume that because I want A, everyone who is even remotely like me want A, too. This is not at all a given.)

There is always someone begging for you to give up your happiness for them

Look… There are people who get targeted for “it is your duty to make everyone/me happy” -ideas, and then there are those who insist that “those people” if not me, should be made happy… Because. Because? Because…. “they’re unhappy.”

You can’t make anyone happy. You can make people feel important, and that’s an entirely different thing, but that’s the height of happiness some people are able to feel. Refuse to indulge, that just keeps them stuck in a false source of happiness. If you are feeding into someone’s sense of entitlement and importance, you are aiding their UNHAPPINESS and DISSATISFACTION, not growth and happiness.

Focus on people whose happiness means something to you, PERSONALLY

There’s probably someone like that in your life, someone who feels your life SHOULD BE about making him or her happy. Ignore them.

Find people who you want to see happy. People whose happiness means YOUR happiness.

There are utterly selfish people in this world, who think their nail polish is more important than the fact that you love someone else. Don’t fucking give up on your love simply because someone’s nail polish needs doing! Someone’s petty dramas are more important to them than the very soul of you. Don’t give those people your power.

Sure, they may say that “all they wanted was some nail polish” but let them ask someone who cares about their nail polish. Don’t allow them waste their time on someone who really couldn’t give two shits about their tiny little dramas. Don’t indulge them. Move on.

Stop touching the guilt you feel for not caring about something that to you is menial.

Each person belongs to themselves first and foremost

No matter how much your leaving will hurt another person, if leaving is what is required for you to make YOU happy, then, leave, you must. Everybody belongs to themselves first and foremost, and even though True Emotion Mirrors feel they belong to each other, they still own themselves first by a fractional margin, but still. There is NO VIRTUE in demanding another person to remain with you against their will – or in allowing them to get their way if and when they do.

Love those people who you find easy to love or impossible to not love… or exciting, thrilling, and wonderful to love

To love is the most precious thing in this world. The RIGHT to love. The PRIVILEGE to love someone. It feels AMAZING to love people.

However, you know what feels like CRAP? To be DICTATED that you are not supposed to love that person but your feelings should be attached to that one or someone similar. When you are being TOLD who you should invest your feelings on. Why? Because it would be really convenient for someone else.

Your feelings belong to the people who inspire them, OK? They belong to the person who makes you feel the wonderful sweet spot between pleasure and pain. There’s no bartering after the fact. The person who makes you feel like a million dollars just to be able to be in the room with them is the person you should direct your feelings to.

And yes. Johnny Depp may get a lion share of love, but he inspired it. Therefore, it’s his to have and keep.

Those of us who cannot inspire love… Will learn to.

To love is not a skill. To inspire love certainly is.

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