When you get serious about someone, play it by the ear (instinct)

There’s a certain rule about true love; it defies all reason, logic, and normal relationship rules. The thing is, when you play by the rules, you may play it safe, but you’ll lose some of the intimacy that should be there between true lovers. You also must know that a response to an instinctive reaction is instinct, and it’s not always love but a genuine, permanent, cold rejection that you will have to eventually respect (or wind up dead if you persist). The fact you love someone doesn’t mean they will love you back, and that is something you must know and understand before you commit jailable offenses in the name of love.

This is why it may be necessary to set up “no rules” playgrounds for adults who understand what this all means, that over-stepping normal boundaries may occur, and all that, but that is for the future… Or now, if you have the means.

When ‘the bossy’ catches you.

By my experience, women in love are bossy by nature. We can’t help it. Men probably expect it. Respectful women tend to lose the game because men don’t even recognize respectful love as love. Yet, I know even women can stop themselves from acting on impulse and instinct.

For instance, there was a guy I really thought loved me and whom I’d given anything for. He kept saying he wasn’t interested and whatnot. I didn’t think he meant it, but it was some kind of a stupid game he played. (It’s complicated.) What I wanted to do, was to pin him against the wall, kick him in the chin bone and scream, “What the fuck’s wrong with you?!”

Another guy I wanted to handcuff into a radiator for much the same purpose; “what the fuck’s wrong with you, and you know that’s your place, yes?”

Obviously, I did neither of those things, but I believe I should have. Something to the effect, at least. Pin them down and demand an answer. Still, I know how STUPID women can be. I know how off the base our wishes can be. I feared I was one of those women chasing men way out of my league and being the last one to see it… So I didn’t. But you know. Sometimes you have to risk being a fool.

Within the law… Follow the instinct.

For as long as it’s legal, do it.

If they seem uncomfortable.

When you play by instinct and they don’t want you, you notice one or two things; they seem visibly uncomfortable and annoyed, or they seem aggressive and fiercely angry. These are two red flags that should tell you to back the fuck off. If “boss play” comes from the right person, the reaction should be a wry smile and a pleased look – even if a hidden one – but not open aggression or obvious discomfort or fightless submission.

Fightless submission means he or she feels they don’t get a say in the matter, even if that is illogical and not entirely sane. They feel this is something that is decided for them, and they cannot say no to even if they wanted to. If they don’t seem pleased or happy, they go along with it because that’s what they believe they have to do in order to be “a good man” or “a good girl.” Abort mission, if not for any other reason, then because they’re boring, but most importantly, because you’d be taking advantage of someone’s childhood or religious traumas.

And AGAIN, the Young Soul*.

There is this little problem in our society that stops your victims from beating you up and killing you if you get a little too fucking familiar with someone; the law. You have to back off early enough so your “loved one” doesn’t have to resort to murder to keep you from lassoing them into a relationship they just REALLY don’t want with you. Unless you want to live in a society where people are permitted to self-defend with murder against moronic love-sick people with a death wish.

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