Why are the Savants* so awkward sometimes – friendly but not really GOING THERE?

the Savants* can give up this “come here go away” vibe quite easily. They’re friendly, open, and approachable, but then pull on the breaks all of the sudden and effectively vanish out of your life. If you chase, they may continue being awkward and evasive, give you a ton of excuses why they’re not there anymore, but you kinda know they’re lying. Why?

The Savants* who EVERYBODY wants to be making friends with and be lovers of feel pressured into liking people. They want to do their own thing, and they want the company for doing the thing with them, but what they often want to do requires a special skillset, EVEN IF it is a hobby. Like it’s really difficult to go hang gliding with someone who doesn’t know how to hang glide nor wants to learn. To the Normal Person*, that CANNOT be a reason not to be friends, because they feel friends are made first and then you choose something to do with friends – more than likely sitting around drinking something. The Savants*, however, prioritize their free time based on the activities they want to do, and they want people to do that stuff with them, RATHER THAN just collect people around themselves and do whatever.

So, if you have a limited number of hours in a week, the Savants* want to devote that time to a specific hobby in a specific company, such as, if they love playing cello, the LEAST they want their friends to be is to be avid cello-music fans. AT LEAST you need to LOVE listening to it, but better yet, play cello yourself. IF they are already highly skilled players, they do not wish to try and teach you the basics that they taught themselves when they were 8, UNLESS you happen to be a musical genius who already knows how difficult or easy it is for them to learn a new instrument and require very little help to get off to a good start. An the Savants* would rejoice a new guy, who has never played the cello, but would GLADLY just play some easy rhythmic score to the piece while the more established player(s) can take the limelight with the complicated parts.

To a Savants*, how eager you are to spend time with them means nothing. EVERYBODY is eager to spend time with them, they have no shortage of company. More often, they HIDE from too many people rather than seek for ANY company at all. If they are looking for any company at all, they mean it TEMPORARILY, for the time being, NEVER permanently unless they get lucky.

Evasiveness

the Savants* often feel a level of guilt for not liking nice people enough to be their friends. They think you’re nice, but if you don’t understand “nice” doesn’t equal “awesome”, they can feel awkward trying to tell you that “Sure you’re nice it’s just that I’m not exactly crazy for you (because you’re not a very impressive person).” When it comes to other the Savants*, they usually don’t need to even tell the other that they’re not interested in the friendship, because they just realize they don’t really jive, their style is different or there’s just some small thing that doesn’t quite work. They both might agree the other is cool enough, just not right for them, and they part without pain or grievance.

the Normal Person* don’t really understand this as they are not looking for anything specific and if they are, they will quickly change their minds just to be “right” for the other person. This is not impressive for a Savants*, but NOT doing that is also not going to work… Often, you get only ONE TRY with a Savants*, and if you say the wrong thing, they can be totally put off by you, EVEN sometimes rejecting their own True Emotion Mirror who was trying to generalize their interests in order to smooth off their sharpest edges for a new person.

So when a Savants* is trying to let the Normal Person* go easy; “it’s not you, it’s me”, or “you know it’s just not what I’m looking for…” the Savants* can eventually be pissed off over being forced to be blunt and rude toward a person not taking a hint too well.

Aloof

the Savants* can also come off quite aloof, distant. Often, that’s how they feel about others. They don’t REALLY care if their childhood friends will ever be seen again – they want them all to be doing well and all, but there’s no real reason to keep feeding relationships with people with who they’ve got nothing incommon. They don’t take relationships very seriously (until they do) and even then, their approach to them is different from the Normal Person*. Still, the Savants* are full-blown romantics and they are looking for someone they can’t ever get enough – not because they’re not there, but even though they’re always there and they’re STILL amazing to them. They want to be constantly at awe at their partners and friends, not just for the fact they’re still there… Like the Normal Person* feel.

A-Poof

the Savants* may eventually vanish out of your life completely. They’ve simply decided you can’t be reasoned with and there’s no way to put it kindly so you’ll understand so they’ll simply cut contact completely and be done with it.

The chances of you bringing them back from A-poof is about one percent or none at all.

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