Why do people hate you

This is a lot to do with self-confidence, self-esteem, self-love, level/type of intelligence, and complexities of the personality, so there is a sense of scale here, rather than an on-off button. Mainly the Young Soul* or mainly the Old Souls* is an option. The more complicated and unusual a person is, the more they go towards the Old Souls* thinking spectrum. An Old Soul* would never consider themselves “common”, “ordinary” or “easy to please”, even though they’d describe themselves as “Easy going”, “accepting”, and “easy to get along with”, and they are.

Defining Success

The Young Soul* would call themselves successful for having a steady job. Their idea of a good friend is someone to go shopping with, and who will show them how to shop right. (That is not a key phrase for the search engines, sadly.) While they might not want to call themselves “ordinary” or “common” either, that is certainly how the Old Souls* view them. As the Young Soul* themselves are always trying to fit into the current fashionable or generally accepted ideal of “acting/dressing their age”, which, to the Old Souls* mean a conscious effort to be common and boring. The Young Soul*, however, get excited about “fashionable people”, as “trendy” is the most interesting a person can be… Or brainwashed, cowardly, fake, as the Old Souls* would call them.

Interestingly enough, the people who fit the standard, the “successful” the Young Soul* have a hard time swallowing the idea that someone might not like them. They view all not liking them as a form of jealousy, because “they don’t know how to be popular/successful.” Countless of Hollywood movies have been filmed about the mutual hatred between these subcultures, and the Young Soul* unshakable belief everyone is envious of them. They interpret all expressions of anger or aggression towards them as jealousy or envy or frustration at one’s own inability to be like the popular people.

the Old Souls* thinking commitment phobics

If the Old Souls* are commitment phobics, the Young Soul* are rejection junkies.

The Old Souls* are difficult to pin into a relationship they don’t want, and they are wanted more often than the Young Soul* who are simply more generic type. As the Young Soul* thrive to be like a given standard, they want to be regarded “good enough” by that standard, and they try to blend in with the other adults a lot, where as the Old Souls* wish to stand out. This causes the obvious conclusion that the Old Souls* gain more attention than the Young Soul* that try their hardest to avoid attention. Therefore the Old Souls* are more wanted and are more used to rejecting people than the Young Soul* are, who are happy about anyone wanting to make friends with them or about anyone showing romantic interest towards them as it is a rarer occurrence for them.

The Young Soul* do not understand, however, how the Old Souls* gain all that love and admiration towards themselves while not following any of the rules. It makes no sense to the Young Soul* to show love and respect for someone who behaves off key, and they tend to explain it away as “simple sexual attraction” which is a factor, yes, but not nearly enough to explain the Old Souls*’s charisma.

Ironically, the Young Soul* wind up chasing the Old Souls* into a relationship, because to them, anyone who is not a standard person of some description is a sub par individual and as such, they SHOULD NOT reject someone who is “the right way”. They chase the Old Souls* until he or she gives in, or until the Old Souls* has completely destroyed the Young Soul* self-confidence doing nothing but what they HAD to do; reject a person they didn’t love.

Acutely in need of finding someone they can respect

While the Young Soul* are acutely trying to find someone who would approve of / love them, the Old Souls* have an acute need to find someone they could respect and love. The word respect means a different thing to these thinker types, to the Young Soul*, respect means more or less the right to say no to sexual advances, where as for a Old Souls*, respect means the joy they feel when they observe another person’s skill level, knowledge, and achievements. When they say they need respect, they mean they want to find someone who views them as their equal skill-wise, and just as importantly, they want to find someone THEY feel admiration towards.

The Young Soul* simply want to find (or force, or teach) someone to love them. To the Young Soul*, love is an action, not a feeling, therefore they believe love can be taught. The Young Soul* are happy to be treated in a certain way, rather than having someone FEEL things for them. They will imagine the feelings on the basis of the way they are treated, as they are not very intuitive. They read things into how people treat them, where as the Old Souls* do not care about how well they are treated on the surface, but how people feel for them. They don’t fall for gifts or charity that is given out of contempt or with an ill will, but the Young Soul* will think nothing of the actual feeling and simply accept the gift as if it was a sign of love or care for real.

The Young Soul* are prone to believing ANY strong feeling as a feeling of love

While the Old Souls* are skilled and precise in their detection of different emotions and nuances between them, the Young Soul* are very coarse in this area. They may interpret ANY strong feeling as love or fear, their ability to identify feelings accurately is still developing on the incarnational cycle. In some sense, they will interpret any strong feeling any which way they see fit, driving the Old Souls* absolutely crazy – and not in the good way.

“You can do anything to me if we’re in love”

Both types of thinkers may well feel this way. The problem is, that the Young Soul* are very often quick to believe the Old Souls* are in love with them even when they are not. They often jump the gun. The Old Souls* also have a naturally similar idea of what is OK and what isn’t, as they match their own value system with those they love on a high level. The Young Soul* view relationships as something reckless: “I will show you how much I dare to hurt you, so you’ll know how cool I am!!!” This maybe because the Old Souls* they often chase for a relationship feel mean to them, so they believe this is a part of a courting ritual. The Old Souls* think differently: “I will show you how well I scale between what you love and what you would never tolerate. I will always respect your boundaries, even if you put yourself into my hands.” The Old Souls*’s goal, with their lover, is to bring them to the cross section of pleasure and pain, but with the Young Soul*, they will overstep those boundaries over and over, in their bid to tell them they do not love that person and to chase them away.

The Old Souls* think differently: “I will show you how well I scale between what you love and what you would never tolerate. I will always respect your boundaries, even if you put yourself into my hands.” The Old Souls*’s goal, with their lover, is to bring them to the cross section of pleasure and pain, but with the Young Soul*, they will overstep those boundaries over and over, in their bid to tell them they do not love that person and to chase them away.

The Old Souls* want to know where the boundaries are so they will never accidentally cross them, where as the Young Soul* want to know where the boundaries are so they can disrespect them and walk all over them. Therefore, it is really difficult for the Young Soul* to tell the difference between their sworn enemy and their best friend, something that to a Old Souls* is a no-brainer.

It could be said that the Old Souls* lack a sense of humor when it comes to the way they are being treated, but the Young Soul* lack a sense of humor about the way they should live their lives. The Young Soul* want to fit in and be proper on the surface, where as the Old Souls* want to live an obscure life right out in the open. The only reason a Old Souls* hide is when they think others would attack them if they knew more about them and being disapproved of would be an inconvenience for them. To the Young Soul*, being found out as improper is the biggest fear they’ve got, even if they did awful things behind the closed doors.

Social and anti social

The Young Soul* are a lot more social than the Old Souls*. They are much more likely to find people they like and love because their standards are significantly lower than the Old Souls*’. Therefore, everywhere they go, they find wonderful people out there, and their biggest sorrow is the Old Souls* who don’t like them and who the Young Soul* think are flawed or mentally disturbed for not liking them. They cannot understand what’s there not to like, considering how well they fit the societal expectations and the latest trends – the very reason the Old Souls* think they are boring, sheep-people who simply mindlessly go with the flock wherever the flock takes them.

The Old Souls* are used to being polite and allowing the Young Soul* to think they are OK. This causes confusion, as the Young Soul* already believe everyone loves them and if they don’t, there’s something wrong with them! They fully believe that they have everything anyone should consider worth loving. The only reason the Young Soul* thinks a someone doesn’t conform to the societal ideal or the latest fashion is that they don’t know how to. They have no concept of the kind of thinking that would explain the need to stand out and to express DIFFERENCE rather than the ability to be fashionable, up to date, law-abiding, and a respectable tax-payer; the right kind.

Hating people

The Old Souls* don’t hate people for being different, but they hate people for trying to force others into the same mode of behavior as they are. The Young Soul* sees it as “trying to help you”. The Old Souls* also hate the Young Soul* for thinking they are better than others while doing nothing original, ever. The Old Souls* hate the Young Soul* for this self-congratulating viewpoint.

The Young Soul* hate the Old Souls* for refusing their generous help to conform and to be better than what they are now. They see all variation from the median a lack of intelligence, whereas the Old Souls* see the failure to stand out as a lack of imagination, lack of creativity, and a sign of cowardliness and, also, stupidity. To them, an intelligent person cannot possibly be solely interested in such mundane and meaningless things as how to dress or what is fashionable and trendy. A respectable person’s interests MUST BE more varied than that, even if those things were included. The Young Soul* see the things the Old Souls* value as “being focussed on the irrelevant” and “being distracted”.

The Young Soul*’s feelings for the Old Souls* are very much about needing their approval and being continually rejected. The Old Souls* should not think they owe love to someone they don’t love, even though that is the play most the Young Soul* put on if they cannot get who they want.

Generally speaking

Both thinker types think the other thinker type is boring, serious, and easily lead. Both think the other type lack self-confidence. Both think the other type is abusive. Both think the other type is childish and immature.

In all psychology, you should look at the values that the scientist behind a theory or the doctor behind a text is upholding. Conformity or freedom. You can judge all psychological and self-improvement text in the context of what are they after, making everyone the same (the Young Soul*) or emphasizing a person’s unique self, as in liberating people (the Old Souls*). Both types try to force the other type into their own way of thinking. Both think the other type is manipulative: “They say they’re going to leave us if we don’t conform.” “They are forcing us to both STAY in a (family/work/romantic) relationship with them AND force us to be the way they want us to be.”

Although a relationship between the two thinker types is possibly amazing, the Old Souls* must be the one who decides whether it’s going to happen or not. The Young Soul* will take on anyone, but the Old Souls* is selective about who they form a close bond with, therefore, there is ONLY ONE OPTION and it is for the Old Souls* to decide.

Subscribe to get a Daily Message