Why do the Survivalist* get stuck on one thought that they can’t shake?

As I start writing this, I have no idea what the answer is going to be. Sort of  like I write most of my posts. It is simply a question that needs answering, and I’ve got the background information to figure this out. I will write out my thought process, just to give you an example on how my mind works. Might be interesting or helpful or just plain scary. Here we go:

So my mum gets stuck on stuff. At 8 to 10 years age, I wanted to live in a traditional Finnish red-earth painted house that was as close to the original condition as possible. That was my childhood dream. I LOVE those houses, I really do, and maybe in some way I wish I could live in one, but the trouble is, they are located on a very specific area, and that area is nowhere near where I would want to live now. At 11 to 12 I wanted to live in Africa, in a jungle, and wear a loin cloth like Tarzan. At 13 to 15 I wanted to live in New York, and from 16 onwards my ideal city was London. At 20, I was dreaming of a life in Italy somewhere. So why would she insist I move back home and buy a house there, when so many much more mature dreams (apart from the Tarzan bit) has come to me since? The most likely answer; that’s the first thing I mentioned of anything of the like that was realistic (the Tarzan bit might have been earlier…) and a dream she could appreciate and like. She now believes I am running from my dream or “trying too hard to impress people” and I should give up trying to impress people by living in Australia (in her reality, I am scared of living in Australia) and come back home.

A reader of mine insists on an explanation on something that I have blogged a thousand times since because of that insistence, and she still cannot get satisfaction to it. I wrote a piece about what Twin Flames felt like, something that really touched her, and in it, I said: “This is not a choice, this is not a fucking choice.” She loved that bit, and now that I have started talking about True Emotion Mirrors, and how the choice is an element in them, she insists that I go back to what I taught before because that gave her the reassurance that she didn’t HAVE TO get over that guy. Yet, nothing about what I teach tells a True Emotion Mirror to get over AN ACTUAL True Emotion Mirror, even though I have found that a lot of people hang onto false hope and insist it’s a True Emotion Mirror, but to her, that thought “it is not a choice” gave comfort; he cannot get away. She now INSISTS I keep promoting that idea further so that she will get my support. The fact that I say “I can’t do that because it is not that simple in the end, and it will, unfortunately, if I over-simplify this, I give people the idea that some relationships well worth preserving are not worth pursuing, simply because they don’t look the same on the surface” makes no difference, because she wants that sentence back.

the Survivalist* want a theory to shape their reality, rather than shape a theory to reality. They want an authority to decide on rules that WILL NEVER CHANGE when new information is discovered, and every time they have to alter their idea of how reality works, they feel an uncertain shift in their worldview. They want things to remain stable and reliable, as unchanged as possible. They love certain-sounding people because they seem like people who will never change their minds… The Idealists* are certain of themselves a lot because they don’t fear changing with new evidence. They are certain without being certain. They are certain “this is better” without having to trust this is ultimately the very final perfect answer. The Idealists* also see a LOT MORE NUANCE between one thing and the next shade of it, and they speak specifically about these nuances, whereas the Survivalist* love big generalizations and overviews that always fit every place; one size fits all, cure-all-solutions, but are bound to find such things do not exist.

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