Why do they react if they don’t have feelings for us?

the Survivalist* want to sometimes push your buttons thinking that if they get a reaction, that’s a sign of love. This is very, very simplified of course, and isn’t always true. Sometimes a Idealists* picks a fight or purposefully irritates someone, or gets provoked into an argument just so they’ll properly fall out of love with someone. They hate arguing, and they particularly hate arguing over nothing, so doing that a lot will make them less likely to get soft and forgive someone they simply don’t want to be involved with anymore. They work out their emotions by getting pissed off and letting themselves act in an irritating manner.

the Idealists* pick a fight to break up and to stay broken up.

An Idealist* almost never picks a fight with a partner. If they do, they will let you know somehow that they are “venting” or don’t really mean it for one reason or another. They don’t want YOU to feel unloved for a second – unless they mean it.

the Idealists* may feel that they need A REASON to break up with someone – quite because the Survivalist* have insisted that to be true. While to a Idealists* “I’m just not that into you” is reason enough, MORE than enough of a reason, the Survivalist* needs something… They feel they basically have to have a criminal record about arm’s length for it to be a disqualifying thing in the dating scene – and depending on where they live, that may work as a CV rather than a problem.

When a Idealists* gives the Survivalist* their “reasons” for a breakup, the Survivalist* cannot understand why any of that would be a problem. The Survivalist* also feel that for as long as we’re fighting, there are feelings involved, but the Idealists* likes their peace. If someone disrupts their peace, that’s enough to provoke their feelings into an argument, provided that there is an existing animosity between the Idealists* and the provoker.

An Idealist* loses their respect for a fight-picker, no matter the outcome of the argument.

the Idealists* hate fighting. Therefore, they get irritated and frustrated with anyone picking a fight. They absolutely loathe people who cannot exist without creating drama. Therefore, the Survivalist* who starts picking a fight may LOSE their respect in 2 minutes or less… Permanently. No option to recover. The Idealists* cannot understand why someone feels the need to pick a fight deliberately.

Basically, when a Idealists* gets irritated into an argument – and it has to be done over some time initially – they’re saying, “You’re in my way,” “You’re getting in the way of my happiness/work/art/peace, and you need to go.” When a Idealists* loses his respect for you, they won’t go back from that. Unfortunately, the Survivalist* think that standing their own ground in an argument wins them respect. For a Idealists* that may be true in a fist fight, but never in a verbal altercation. Therefore, the Survivalist* is trying to save face by arguing more, sinking deeper and deeper into the Idealists*’s black list, doing the exact opposite of what they’re trying to achieve, losing respect with every argument they start.

Fight to turn them off.

While the Survivalist* can pick a fight to turn a partner on sexually – and they get turned on by a fight – the Idealists* couldn’t feel less sexual if they tried after an argument. They HATE ARGUING with every fibre of their being. Still ,their first instinct is always to win any fight they’re involved in. Still, if they are being provoked into a fight, they feel absolutely MATURE and VINDICATED if they have the presence of mind to walk away from a fight and not engage into it at all.

Sometimes, the Idealists* pick a fight, thinking that they should turn their partner or friend off them permanently because fighting is annoying… So if they always pick up the fight, they think they’re acting in a way that would make that other one go away, but the Survivalist* is trying to recover their face… In the worst way possible as far as a Idealists* is concerned.

That’s how the Survivalist* “win a relationship” too. If they feel they are the last ones standing in a continuous fight, they think they “won a relationship.”

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