Why the concept of divorce protects true love.

Clearly, we should talk about a breakup because polygamous True Emotion Mirror marriage is not a legal marriage, to begin with (in most areas of the word), but in all practicality, this is a marriage, so I’m using the word divorce rather than a breakup.

The idea of divorce was one of the first things that threw us into complete disharmony in my relationship. As our relationship currently exists on a soul level only, this means we must be completely open in our communication because all my husbands can hear all my thoughts and feel all my emotions, although I cannot feel all of them at the same time – only the one I focus on – otherwise I couldn’t tell who feels what.

Anyway, this will sound a tad odd, but over the ions of lives, I have made some deep connections with a lot of men. Men are like air to me, I love every one of them, pretty much, and that has gotten me into a bit of a strife. While panicking about the sheer number of men, we decided that one of the ways to make sure there’d be noone entering this relationship half heartedly would be to decide that you were either in or out – if you would enter our marriage, divorce would be out of the question… This is true not only in this lifetime but in the following ones as well – complete, 100% commitment. When we decided that, we were all completely and utterly convinced that we wanted to live together forever, and smugly, we thought this was a challenge only to The Wrong Ones; the Wrong Ones couldn’t possibly commit the way we had.

Then we decided there was no way out.

BIG mistake.

Subscription on love.

Once the doors slammed shut, I could sense a panic in the air. We were all trying to calm each other down that it’s just an adjustment, it’s just that this is all quite new, it’s all gonna be okay, we are amongst the very people we love the most in this world, and… and… and… THIS SUCKS!!! No way out? The challenge was gone; only the trap was left.

Suddenly, love wasn’t a gift anymore, and it wasn’t a privilege to receive it; it wasn’t an honor to have all these men at my feet; it was a duty to love, and to not receive love turned into a personal insult. Giving love became an obligation, and receiving a simple act of collecting a payment.

It didn’t take us long to decide to ban the entire idea of no divorce but to put the divorce on a pedestal; this lovely thing was the very thing that made our commitment valuable, sacred, and pure: freedom. It was the freedom of choice that made it so very precious to be united like this. Each one of us could be with anyone they wanted, and they chose this crazy bunch of people?! It was the one thing that made us special: the option to leave when we wanted.

You’re not divorcing just one person in polygamy.

But then, when you surround yourself with the people you love the most, how could you ever even contemplate such a thing as leaving? That was akin to shooting yourself in the foot. And thigh. And right arm… Well you get the idea! Not only are you leaving one person but you’re leaving a whole bunch of them! Each of my husbands have their best friend and brother in this marriage, and so do I. The thought of tearing away from this caused us such pain that the thought of divorce was inconceivable, yet an absolute necessity to the sanctity of this marriage. It is not a trap, it is a freedom.

Another point to consider are children. If you plan on having children, then separation is going to be a dilemma. I suggest that you read the next post about choosing a partner, too, and natural flow, and understand that should divorce be necessary the children need to be allowed to choose the parent they’ll follow for themselves, at least as much as practicality allows; and the biological parents should not be their only option if it is possible to arrange them to live with their Precious Soulmate* parent if there is one.

Money should not stop you from leaving.

Money is also such a trap that it can be considered a barrier to absolute freedom of choice. It would be best that all partners have their own source of income and a separate bank account (it makes buying gifts more meaningful too) so that should one of you want to leave, they have no trouble making that happen. The doors to leaving must be wide open.

Making divorce as valuable part of the marriage as the wedding, you extend full trust in your own feelings, unconditional love to your spouses and keep the relationship fresh every day of your life, as you choose each other again every day, loving each other every day, making sure no day goes by that you take each other for granted or make someone wait for their turn because there are more important matters or spouses to take care of… And if you do find yourself in a situation that one spouse just gets ignored, you know they are not in the right marriage and they should have the freedom to go seek their true destiny.

The truest marriage is founded on absolute freedom to be with whomever you choose to be. If you have to force the issue, you are unsure whether or not you’ve married someone else’s spouse… Or indeed, try to lock other’s out.

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