Why you should not endeavor to “try to be friendly/friends” with people who you don’t really like

We are kind of taught to be accepting and make friends with everybody, and that we should try to broaden our minds and try not to be too prejudicial about who we hang out with, but I’m saying maybe you should be. The thing is, that when you extent that olive branch to someone, they will think you’re seeking friendship in order to BECOME MORE LIKE THEM. Whoever approaches another person SHOULD do it with the intent to be CHANGED toward that person, rather than the other way around.

Think of this from your own perspective. Someone comes to you for friendship, then, starts to gradually try and make you change into their liking. THEY think they’re doing you a favor by “showing you a better way”, but you think “WHAT THE FUCK?! Why would you make friends with me and then in the next moment start making ‘improvements’?!”

There is a possibility, of course, that you wouldn’t want to change a person at all, but still maintain a friendship with them even though you’re different and that’s fine and dandy in theory, but imagine that person will INTERPRET the fact you don’t try to change them as your ADMIRATION toward them, and as a request of THEM to change you instead.

The thing is, we are all our own display of perfection. EVERYONE in this world presents themselves in the most positive light they know, no matter what it looks like to you. If they are a drug dealer, they regard themselves as tough or even helpful, depending. No matter how you may view any given person, from their own perspective, they are a picture of perfection. I am, you are, they are. Therefore, whoever you approach, should probably match your own ideals quite closely already, or leave them alone completely.

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