You cannot ALWAYS punish, nor can you ALWAYS forgive.

Correcting people, raising children, and making bad people good is a balance. If you never put boundaries on another person’s behavior, they’ll always take advantage of you, mistreat you, and expect YOU to be good to them while they get to do whatever they want. If, in turn, you’re always hard and unkind to another person, punish, never reward, you’re going to turn them either off you or completely bad – and how fast it happens depends on their past life experiences. Remember that you are not the only person in anybody’s life (unless you have a few screws loose and keep them there against their will, of course), and therefore, they’ll always have access to other people. HOPEFULLY, those other people know how to be kind or tough on your kid, for example.

Prison systems, thus, should be designed with this in mind. Sometimes, it’s a complete lack of boundaries and limits that brought these people in. MORE OFTEN than that, however, it is a complete lack of kindness and recognition that got them there. In their case, being hard on them, adding boundaries to already limited life, being unkind to those who have never known anything different, and punishing a person who has no reason left to care is not going to do anything but further damage to a person.

A tough and unloving environment turns you into tough and unloving.

If you’ve lived a life among tough, unloving people, you’re going to turn either cold toward them or tough and unkind toward everyone around you. You learn you get nothing in this world if you ask nicely. You cannot expect people to learn to love under a whip!

If you’ve never been given anything without jumping through hoops or stealing it, you’ll also never learn to give. It is an action that doesn’t make sense. If you haven’t felt the joy and love toward a person who is giving, you don’t understand what control or benefit you acquire by being generous. How much you COMMAND LOVE and respect by being NICE.

Then, there are those who think being nice makes it so easy to love them that they decide to be horrible every day of their lives just to see who loves them regardless.

We need boundaries to know the limits of reality.

That said, sometimes a person needs BOUNDARIES. These are pampered or neglected, ignored people who feel SCARED in a world where they cannot find a boundary or limitation to their whims and desires. They’ve felt like they’ve lived in a vacuum without real interaction with others. THEY may well need a whipping. They may well crave it and be drawn to people who are angry at them.

Just imagine a life where everyone does what you ask of them, always agrees with you, and never denies anything of you. You’d be treated like a celebrity, king, or dictator. You’d quickly lose your mind. You don’t know the boundaries of your reality, right? If you further imagine the spiritual idea that we get everything we always wanted, 100% of the time, which we do, the idea of “what is real” starts to quickly evaporate. We NEED (and want) boundaries. We need other people to tell us no. “You can have it, but not with me. Not from me.” And to some people the fact this person tells them “no” is the sweetest thing they’ve ever encountered.

Enforced fake boundaries.

These trans kids are going crazy when one of the most reliable and secure boundaries have been removed from them: being just a boy or being just a girl.

Boundaries are very, very important, just so we know what is real and what isn’t. We need honest feedback to hear what we truly are in the eyes of other people. Other people are mirrors to us, and if they never say anything, or always say one thing, you’ll start losing that idea of who you truly are – or you work mentally hard every day trying to keep yourself in balance.

Being FORCED to stay a girl or a boy when internally you feel like the opposite is one thing. Completely removing the security of the common sense options, penis makes a boy, vagina makes a girl, creates a dangerous sense of not knowing which way is up, and creates nervous, easily offended, insecure people whose only need is to be given the gold star for passing for the gender they weren’t born in: NOW you KNOW what is real and what isn’t. Now you know how to be a real boy or a real girl… A real person. Sadly… That doesn’t always happen.

Obviously, trans ideas are new, before, enforced weird boundaries were different. Boys don’t wear their hair long (??), or if your dad’s a shoe maker, his son will be a shoe maker, too.

The Truth.

The most important thing in life is the truth. The most important thing to hear about yourself is the truth. It doesn’t need to be told harshly or unlovingly, but it needs to be told as you mean it. The best skill you’ll ever learn is to figure out the definition of the truth, speak it always, and welcome it spoken to you.

Truthfully: Was your kid as bad as that punishment you gave them? Were you as angry as you pretended to be?

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